


Trust In Me

by Faye_Trevelyan_Inquisitor



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Anal, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Broken Promises, Drama & Romance, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Forced Orgasm, Heavy Angst, Hurt Shiro (Voltron), Keith (Voltron) is Bad at Feelings, M/M, Rape/Non-con Elements, Sad, Shiro (Voltron) Has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Shiro (Voltron) is a Mess
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-04
Updated: 2020-08-21
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:54:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 8
Words: 22,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25715383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Faye_Trevelyan_Inquisitor/pseuds/Faye_Trevelyan_Inquisitor
Summary: Family had meant something to Shiro when he had left that day for Kerberos. Had meant the whole world to him, and he didn't want Adam to see him slowly die from this damned disease, rotting in a bed in the Garrison hospital.So Shiro took a chance for the stars.He had no idea what those stars truly held.Dangerous, foul creatures that would soon tear him asunder than allow him to live.But there was a glimmer of hope and Shiro kindled that into the Paladins today.Returning back to Earth, Shiro and the others made sure to bolster Earth's defenses, see to the Atlas and the Lions.But with everyone so wrapped up in their own problems and Shiro struggling to hide his own broken grief, mistakes are soon made. Miscalculations and harsh judgement from his fellow soldiers, Shiro is breaking at the seams.And no one seems to notice how their beloved hero, their ever dutiful Leader and Captain is breaking apart.No one----save Keith.Determined to save the Captain from the detrimental downward spiral he was trapped in, Keith confesses everything to the other. Including how much he truly loves the other.Will Keith be able to save the other, or will Shiro fall?
Relationships: Adam/Shiro (Voltron), Allura/Lance (Voltron), Keith/Lance (Voltron), Keith/Shiro (Voltron)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 15





	1. Just One Second

**Author's Note:**

> Okay! This is going to be a super angsty! Lots of Shiro angst! I mean lots! But there is gonna be some fluff and smut too, so not to worry.  
> But, just be ready! I have a lot of feels I need to work through after Voltron so---here we go~!

Trust in Me.  
Chapter One: Just One Second.

The trip back to Earth had been a taxing one, hard and tedious and filled with so many different challenges. Who could have known that when they all finally arrived back to Earth that the war had already reached her borders.  
By Sendak of all Galra.  
Keeping the Lions out of his reach was the best answer possible while Shiro and the other Paladins made their way to the surface to see what remained of the resistance.  
It took careful skill and flying, with an added crash landing at the end of it, but they had managed to make it back to Earth in one piece.  
Greeted by the members of the resistance, they were led back to HQ where Iverson and the Paladin’s family greeted them.  
Shiro hadn’t been ready for the grief that met him there. And the overwhelming sense of guilt when he learned of his former lover’s passing. How it rattled the other so.  
Shiro found his way to the memorial wall and pressed his fingers against the nameplate.  
“Adam…..I’m so sorry….the things I said….I didn’t mean them….” Shiro bit his lip to combat the tears that threatened to fall. He couldn’t break. Not now. Not when he was needed most.  
But God did he want to.  
To just give up and surrender it all.  
But Adam when down fighting. And so would Shiro.

“Shiro?” The man glanced over his shoulder to see Keith standing behind him, a broken expression crossing his face. “I heard….I came to….” Keith struggled to find the words to explain how hurt he was, for he had grown up with Adam as much as he had grown up with Shiro. He loved them both so dearly.  
Shiro held his arm out and Keith crossed the room in seconds, pressing his face into Shiro’s chest to muffle the broken sobs that left his lips.  
“I’m sorry! I’m so sorry! I know how important he was!” Keith wept as Shiro felt his own tears spill down his cheeks.  
“He was important to both of us.” Shiro whispered, looking back to the nameplate before closing his eyes. “But we have to keep going. Adam would want us to. For the sake of Earth.”  
Violet eyes fluttered up to meet steel grey orbs, both red from tears.  
“For Earth.” Keith agreed and wiped his eyes with his sleeve. Nodding at Shiro, Keith turned to leave and head back to the training room to keep in shape until Voltron was ready to lead the fight with the ATLAS.  
Sparing one last look over his shoulder to the wall, Shiro let a shuddering breath escape his lungs while whispering a soft prayer for Adam.  
“Forgive me, Adam….”

The briefing was detailed and long, they needed to know everything before plans were set into motion. It took a great deal of time, but soon MFE pilots were launched and Lions had arrived.  
Taking out the bases had been hard, but they had managed and Shiro was immensely proud of his Paladins. They had grown so much since the time from where they had first acquired their Lions.

But the pride was short lived when new information flooded them in the form of the Zaiforge cannons. That was a real problem. One that Voltron couldn’t handle alone.  
ATLAS needed to be airborne.  
Now.

“Get everyone on this ship for evacuation! We need to get outta here!” Shiro ordered, watching Sam and Veronica work on getting all of ATLAS’ power to max.  
With Coran’s aide, and the crystal from the Castle of Lions, the ATLAS was soon in flight and ready to join the fight.  
It was difficult and a tough fight.  
“With Sendak in control of those cannons, we can’t do much to stop them while his cruiser’s are protecting him!”  
“We need to take Sendak out!” Shiro barked, staring at the several cruisers that impeded their path to the flagship.  
“Sam! If someone is able to disrupt the power crystal from the inside, will that stop the cannons from firing on Earth?”  
“It just might! But how are we gonna do that!?”  
“I’m going over. You’ll be able to use my hand.” Shiro was already gearing up and pulling his helmet on.  
“Are you sure? The space between us and the flagship is immense, not to mention dangerous.”  
“We have to try. And I’m the best one qualified for this. I’ve done this a million times.” Shiro laughed as he glanced out the door. “Sure….millions of times….okay, here I go!” Shiro was leaping from the ATLAS and headed on his way to Sendak’s ship.  
It took some careful flying and tactical attacks from the Paladins, but they, along with ATLAS, had managed to not only defeat Sendak’s ship, but the other mechanical monster that had invaded Earth.

Figuring out that the power source and pilot was Altean was a shock no one had been ready for. Lance was the first to Allura’s side when he learned what was going on, Hunk and Pidge soon after. It was a shock and it sent most of the crew rattling.  
Keith watched from the sidelines, like he always did, as the rest of the Paladins and Shiro worked to console Allura after the startling realization.  
Haggar was still alive.  
And very much a threat.

“We need a plan before we go rushing off into a fight we know nothing about.” Shiro argued for the umpteenth time.  
“There are still Alteans out there! At Haggar’s mercy!”  
“And no one understands that more than me, but we need to think this through. We need a plan, we need intel. And we don’t have that. Yet. Just give us some time, Princess.” Shiro pleaded with the furious Altean, watching her cross her arms over her chest.  
“You have one week, Shiro. We’re leaving, one way or another.” Allura stomped off and Lance shot Shiro a glare before the rest of the team left the room.  
Letting out a slow breath, Shiro braced both hands against the table and closed his eyes.  
If anyone looked close enough, one could see the Captain coming apart at the seams, but no one seemed to notice that their beloved hero was slowly breaking apart.  
His Paladins seemed to be turning on him, the Princess was far too emotionally invested to think clearly---hell, she wouldn’t even listen to Coran! Or Romelle.  
A curse left Takashi’s lips and he punched the table once more before another sigh left his lips and he left the room to find his quarters.  
Not realizing Keith had been standing outside the room the whole time, watching as Takashi slowly broke when he was alone.  
Had Lance and the others always been treating him like this? Like the man didn’t risk life and limb----give everything for them and Earth! The man died for them, for God’s sake! How could they just turn on him like that?! After everything the man had been through, they just left him like that!  
Keith clenched his hands into tight fists, baring his fanged teeth at the thought of confronting the other Paladins about how they were breaking Shiro.

“And Lance, of all people! Lance is the one who is hurting him the most! Now that he’s all wrapped up in Allura and her problems, he doesn’t even seem to care what he’s doing to Shiro!” Keith vented to his mother, Krolia, while they sat in his room.  
“Keith, listen, you need to take it easy. You’re getting all worked up over someone who may not even want any help.” Krolia offered as she watched her kit pace back and forth in the small room.  
Kosmo whined at how upset Keith was and nudged the other gently, trying to offer some comfort to his distressed master.  
Keith took a slow breath, then another before dropping to sit on his bed and scowl.  
“It’s not fair to him. Everyone is off with their own problems and their own families that they seem to forget that they ARE Shiro’s family. We’re all he has left! How could they just abandon him like that?!” Violet eyes fluttered yellow and he snarled, which had his mother chuckling and reaching to stroke the top of Keith’s head.  
“I know. Shiro has given everything, including his life for the Paladins and the galaxy. People seem to forget the sacrifices others make so that they have the chance to live a normal life. Lance and the others suddenly have a chance to spend time with their families, to have normal problems before the next phase of the war. Don’t forget, they are just kids too. Kids who have seen a great deal more than anyone could ever imagine, but kids nonetheless. Give them a little slack, Keith. And maybe try to remind them gently and not forcing them to apologize your sword.” Krolia chuckled, watching her kit glare at her before he pouted with a huff.  
“I wasn’t planning that.”  
“Of course not, my son.” She purred and Keith visibly relaxed.  
“I….just don’t like to see him hurting like this…..after everything, he deserves to be happy the most…and with Adam’s passing….” Keith shuddered and hugged himself, closing his eyes with a distressed noise. “He has no one but us. No one else seems to realize that….”  
Adam’s passing had been hard on Shiro, more than he cared to admit. And on Keith.  
He had grown up with the two after Keith’s father died. He knew how much Shiro had loved Adam and how it broke the older when Adam left him.  
Shiro had always planned to make it up to Adam, but he never got the chance to apologize for his mistake. And with that little crack in Shiro’s near impenetrable defenses, Shiro’s mask was slowly breaking down.  
It was sad that Keith was the only one who noticed those little things.  
Looking up to the ceiling, another sigh left Keith’s lips and he glanced back to his mother.  
“How do I fix this?”  
“Be there. That’s all you can do for now. If he needs help, he’ll ask for it.”  
“Tch. You don’t know Show that well then. He never asks for help. I don’t think I’ve once heard him ask anyone for help.” Keith sneered before pushing himself up to his feet. “I’m gonna go find him, just talk with him. Let him know he’s not alone.” Keith waved his mother off before she had the chance to say anything and was out the door.

It was late. For too late for Shiro, Captain of the ATLAS to be awake. But memories were an awful thing that kept him up at night. Plus, the way Lance and Allura had looked at him only hours ago made the other extremely unsettled.  
He was trying to do his best for everyone. He didn’t just have the Paladins to think about anymore, he had everyone on the ATLAS to worry about now too! Why couldn’t they see that?!  
A shaky breath left Shiro’s lungs and he stared at the beverage in front of him. What was it again? Tea? Coffee? He couldn’t even remember what button he had pushed when he had stood at the machine.  
Toying with the cool metal handle on the mug, Shiro closed his eyes and let his head drop.  
He knew everyone was asleep, save for the routine patrol that walked the halls before their shift’s end, Shiro knew he was alone.  
He braced his flesh hand against his face and grit his teeth, combating the tears that threatened to spill despite his will to keep them at bay.  
How had it ended up like this? That the Paladins he swore to protect with his life had come to hate him so? Where had he gone wrong? What had he done?  
And how was he going to fix this?

A noise drew steel eyes up and he saw Keith step into the mess hall, Kosmo in tail.  
“Keith. What are you doing up so late?”  
“Could ask the same thing about you?” Keith chuckled and shrugged his shoulders while grabbing a mug and filling it with warm amber liquid. “Couldn’t sleep. Too stressed over what’s to come.” Keith explained, though that was only half true. He was stressed, but not about the fight.  
About Shiro.  
“Ah. I see. Don’t worry, Keith. We’ll find a way to win. With you leading Voltron, I have no doubts.” Shiro managed a smile, though it was strained and tired. And if Keith could see that, then Shiro really was frayed at the edges. It was worse than he had feared.  
“Are you okay, Kashi?” Keith asked, reaching across to touch his fingers to Shiro’s arm. A look crossed Shiro’s face, one caught between worry and bewilderment. Had Keith caught him in a lie?  
When Shiro had opened his mouth the answer with a noncommittal answer, the alarms blared overhead and Shiro snapped his eyes up.  
“Galra battle cruisers! Off our bow! Five of them and loads of fighters!” Came Iverson’s voice and Shiro was quick to shove to his feet.  
“Get to your Lion, Keith! I need to get the ATLAS ready!” Before Keith had any time to respond, Shiro was already sprinting around the corner and vanishing from his line of sight.  
“Damn it. Come on, Kosmo! Let’s go!”


	2. Don't Let Go

Chapter Two: Don’t Let Go

“Lance! We need to go! Now!” Keith ordered, watching the other Paladins scramble to get to their Lions while Black took to the sky.  
“I’m working on it, Keith!” Lance shouted as he slid into Red’s chair and was soon joining the rest of the team. “Okay, okay! What’s the plan?”  
“We need to keep those fighters at bay long enough for the MFE pilots to get airborne. Once done, that’ll provide air support for the ATLAS against the fighters while we go up against the Cruisers. That’ll focus the Cruisers on us and not on the ATLAS and her weapons. Let’s go, guys!” Keith barked and all Lions started their attack.

“Iverson! Weapons status?” Shiro shouted as he jumped to the console.  
“Charging now, 75 percent!”  
“Veronica! What’s our shield status!?”  
“Fully charged and engaged!”  
“Good, Sam? What about engines?”  
“We’re ready for full max thrust when you give the order, Sir!”  
“Coran! Bring us around to heading 24.31!”  
“Aye aye, Captain!” Coran shouted as the giant warship shifted her movement to line up her shot with one of the cruisers.  
“MFE pilots, you are a go! Clear us a path to the cruisers!” Shiro ordered as the jets launched from their bays.  
“Roger that, sir!”  
“Keith! Voltron is clear to engage! Take out those cruisers! UNNH! What was that?!” Shiro snapped his head around to search for the source of the blast.  
“Another five more cruisers dropped out of hyperspace behind us! They’ve got us pinned, Captain!”  
“Damn! How are shields holding?”  
“82 percent, Captain! But another few more hits from the ion cannons will deplete our shield!” Shiro hissed out a breath and gripped to the console as another blast rattled the ship.  
“Alright, we need to draw them away from Voltron! See if we can take most of the cruisers with us. Voltron can’t handle all of these on their own. Iverson, give them everything we’ve got!”  
“You got it!” Iverson opened fire from the ATLAS and attacked as many cruisers as they could while drawing the brunt of the fight away from Voltron.

“What’s he doing?!” Keith snapped, watching the ATLAS drift away from them and take most of the cruisers with her.  
“He’s buying us time, Keith! We need to hurry and take out Haggar’s ship!” Allura hissed, shooting her Lion forward.  
“No! We can’t! They are risking their lives for us! We can’t just abandon them!” Keith argued, spinning his Black Lion around to fly back towards the ATLAS.  
“Keith?! What are you doing?! We have to go after Haggar! The ATLAS can handle itself!” Lance shouted, chasing after him in Red.  
“You don’t get it, do you?! You’ve been so wrapped up in your own problems and Allura’s problems, you’ve forgotten what’s important! All of you have!” Keith hissed, feeling those hot tears stinging his vision again. “I can’t believe you’ve forgotten….”  
“Keith! Get back with the team, use this opportunity to take out Haggar!” Shiro’s face flooded the screen and violet eyes went wide at the silver haired man.  
“No! I can’t just leave you!”  
“We’ll be fine, go! That’s an order.” Shiro frowned before the screen flickered off and Keith jerked his Lion to a halt.  
“Keith! You heard Shiro, let’s go!”  
What do I do? Keith begged, gripping to Black’s controls even tighter. What can I do? Keith watched as the ATLAS took round after round from the cruisers, her shields flickering every time she took a blow.  
And then, the shields were gone and an ion blast tore right through the hull.  
“Oh no…”

“UNNNHH! Sam, give me a status report!” Shiro barked as he gripped to the center console, watching as Iverson chased the flames with his fire extinguisher.  
“We’ve got a hull breach in levels 22, 35 and 75! There are several fires in the bays and on levels 19 and 44! One engine is only powering at half capacity and if we don’t fix that, the other is going to overheat and we’ll be sitting ducks!”  
“Coran! Take Veronica and head down to help Sam! Iverson and I will keep up the attack as best we can! And be careful of any unwanted guests! Our sensor relay is down and I have no idea who’s on this ship.” Shiro ordered as he rapidly started to tap at his own console.  
“Captain!”  
“Krolia! What is it?!”  
“We’ve got massive injuries here on bay 23! We need help!”  
“Iverson! Go help Krolia tended to the wounded! I’ll deal with the cruisers!”  
“But Captain---!”  
“That’s an order!” Shiro barked, snapping a lethal glare at the older man before Iverson swallowed and nodded, vanishing down the hall. “Krolia, I’m sending Iverson to help you!”  
“Understood Captain!”  
Shiro was running his fingers rapidly across the screen when he heard Keith’s voice.  
“Keith!”  
“Shiro, what can we do!?” He younger male asked, his face on screen once again.  
“You should be going after Haggar! Not worrying about us! Go back to the others! Take out Haggar! We’ll be fi---AAAAHHHH!!!” Another ion shot tore through the hull again and the screen flickered into static before shorting out.  
“SHIRO!!” Keith screamed and the Black Lion shot forward, joining the fray in a desperate attempt to protect the ATLAS.  
“Keith! What are you doing?!” Allura hissed, but Keith cut off her comm and was attacking a cruiser.  
“Shiro! Shiro answer me, please! Shiro!” Keith cried into the comm, watching yet another ion blast tear through the ATLAS. “Come on, come on, come on! I need to save them!!” Keith hissed, white knuckling his controls until Black roared in response, those wings forming behind the Black Lion and boosting her speed and power even more. She tore through the cruisers until there were all but two left.  
They made a retreat and Allura screamed at Keith for letting this chance slip away.  
But he ignored her.  
His only concern was getting to the ATLAS and checking on everyone. Especially her beloved Captain.

Docking into the broken bay, Keith grabbed Kosmo by his coat and all but warped to the main control room.  
“Shiro!” Keith was racing towards the downed man, seeing the blood dropping from a severe head wound and shrapnel embedded in his ribcage. “Shiro! Answer me!”  
A soft moan left those lips and Keith almost broke down and cried right there. He was still alive, if barely.  
“Kosmo, the medical bay.” Keith told the wolf and he obliged, vanishing with a blue light, only to reappear with another flash. “Mom!” Keith cried when he saw her working over the wounded.  
“Keith! Oh no…” She was quick to rush over to the Captain, examining the other closely before tsk’ing. “Get him to a bed! I need to treat that wound now. Iverson! I need a hand here!” She ordered, watching the Commander come rushing over when he saw the state of the Captain.  
“Shit!”  
“Is he gonna be okay, mom?”  
“I don’t know, Keith. Only time will tell.” Krolia assured her kit and Keith made a soft noise, before looking over his shoulder at his name.  
Great. Lance.  
“What the hell, man?! How could you just leave us like that?!”  
“Are you serious right now? Look around you, Lance. We were needed here more that Allura needed to go after Haggar. We’ll get another chance.”  
“And what about the Alteans in her ship, Keith?!” Allura snapped, throwing her helmet to the side.  
“It was a risk and you knew that! There is no proof that there are any other Alteans on Haggar’s ship! That pilot could have been the only one!”  
“Now we’ll never know! We were this close, Keith! This close to getting some of my people back!”  
“And who are you willing to risk to get your people back?! Coran?! Romelle?! SHIRO?!” Keith roared, eyes flickering yellow again with his rage and anguish. “Do you see him! Lying on a table with shrapnel in his side! Do you see what you’re risking?!”  
“We all knew that this could be dangerous….” Allura started, her guilt starting to seep through.  
“No! Don’t give me that shit, Allura! Shiro warned you that we didn’t have enough intel, that it was a damned suicide mission, yet you rushed off with the others like it was no big deal! Leaving the ATLAS and the others to fight twelve Galra cruisers on their own! You decided this without consulting anyone first! So don’t tell me about the risks. Shiro may die because of you and I’ll never forgive you for that!” Keith snarled, fanged teeth exposed before he turned away from the others.  
“Keith…?” Allura started to call, but Kosmo snarled at her, hackles raised as he stood behind Keith.  
“Get out of here, Allura. All of you. I don’t even want to look at any of you right now. Lance most of all. Your sister was here, yet you chase after Allura with no regard to your own family. I am disappointed in all of you.” Keith growled again and listened to the others slowly walk away.  
When their footsteps faded, Keith steeled a glance over his shoulder to make sure they all were truly gone.  
Krolia then stepped up to her kit and touched his shoulder.  
“You may have been a little harsh on them.”  
“They’ll get over it. I’m their leader and I can’t even stand to look at them right now.” Keith hissed, arms folded across his chest while violet eyes watched every movement Shiro made.  
He looked so weak there, lying in the bed. Kosmo felt the desperation rising in Keith’s chest and whined, standing to nudge the half breed once more.  
Resting his hand on top of the cosmic wolf’s head, Keith relaxed his tense posture and looked back to his mother.  
“I’ll be meeting with Sam and the others to discuss our next plan. Now with Shiro unconscious, Iverson is going to have to step up.” Keith smirked as the older male balked at him before leaping to his feet.  
“Yes sir!” Iverson saluted before pausing and blushing. “I mean….”  
“Relax, Commander.” Keith assured before walking down the hall. “Tell me if anything changes, mom.” Keith called before looking for Sam and Veronica.

It didn’t take long to find the pair, accompanied by Coran as they worked to get the ATLAS back up and running before the next wave of Galra cruisers came to finish them off.  
“Sam! What’s the news?” Keith called as he rushed to his side, looking over the screens to study the information flooding them.  
“There are as many hull breaches as there are fires! Those ion cannons sure did a number on us. How’s the Captain?”  
“What?”  
“I heard one of the shots tear through the central command. Is he okay?”  
“He….we don’t know…he’s still unconscious. He took a pretty severe hit….” Keith frowned as Coran and Veronica glanced to each other.  
“Well! If anyone can survive a almost direct hit with an ion cannon, it would be Shiro! He’ll be fine in an hour or so!” Coran grinned, trying to cheer them up before he set back to work again.  
“So, what do we need?”  
“Supplies, things we don’t have on board. Someone would have to go back down to Earth to get some more supplies for the ATLAS. Coran and I can wrangle up some people to start patching the holes and Veronica can continue to work on getting our shields back up.”  
“I’ve almost got it.” Veronica hissed while her fingers typed rapidly.  
“I can take the Black Lion down and get more supplies to fix the ship. Just tell me what you need.”

With the list, Kosmo and Keith raced back to Black to load up and head down to Earth to get what was needed to fix the ATLAS. It was going to be a couple trips since a lot of the stuff was large and heavy, but Keith could manage.  
However, Hunk had joined up beside him and Keith flicked his glance over to the Yellow Lion.  
“What do we need?” Hunk called and Keith smiled warmly before rattling off the list. “That’s….a lot. We could sure use the other Lions to help.”  
“They’re probably still pissed at me for yelling at them.” Keith hissed,  
“The yelling, maybe….but what you said was true. We did get caught up in trying to find Allura’s people that we forgot about the others. It’s nice to have you to remind us of that.” Hunk smiled for his friend and Keith sighed. “Besides….I already called them to help.” Hunk grinned as the other three Lions joined Black and Keith on their flight back to Earth.  
“Allura, look, I’m…”  
“No, Keith. You were right. I got so lost in trying to save my people that I forgot about the ones that truly matter to me. You and Shiro, Coran and Romelle. You’re all so important to me and I was just so desperate to save them that I rushed into a fight without even thinking. That’s why you pilot the Black Lion, Keith. You’re the most calm headed out of all of us.”  
“Yeah, Keith. Calm.” Lance chuckled and Keith snorted.  
“Look who’s talking, Lance.” Keith chuckled before relaxing his tense grip on Black’s controls. “I’m sorry I yelled at you guys. I shouldn’t have, but I was just so panicked. I didn’t know what else to do.”  
“We understand, Keith. We don’t blame you.” Pidge assured him and Keith sighed. “So…how is everyone on the ATLAS? Is everyone okay?”  
“There were some few minor injuries. Sam and Veronica are fine, so don’t worry. But Shiro……he took almost a direst hit from the ion cannon. They’re not…..” Keith bit his lip and dropped his head, fighting back his wave of tears.  
“What do you mean?! Keith! What about Shiro!?” Lance’s panicked voice shrilled a few octaves higher and Keith closed his eyes even tighter.  
“They don’t know if he’s going to make it. The damage done is extreme, it’s even a miracle he survived the initial blast.” Keith explained, his voice hard and raspy, full of the emotion he was trying to drown.  
The trip down to Earth was silent after that.

It took several hours to get all the materials needed to patch the hull breach, but they managed and the ATLAS was almost a full power once more.  
“Sam! Tell me what you got.” Keith hummed as he stepped up beside Iverson and Krolia.  
“Both engines are running at full power once again. The shields have been recharged and all hull breaches have been repaired. The ATLAS is ready to join the fight once again.” Sam smiled, though it fell shortly when he remembered that their Captain was still in the medical ward. “How is Shiro doing?”  
Keith frowned and shook his head.  
“No change. He’s still unconscious.” Keith sighed and glanced down the hall towards the medical ward.  
“Then this is going to be a problem. The ATLAS only changed forms when Shiro was at the helm.”  
“I know. We’ll figure it you. We just have to….”  
“Keith!” It was Veronica’s voice. Keith pivoted to see the femme racing towards him. “He’s finally awake!”  
Keith had barely taken one step when Kosmo appeared beside him in a flash. And in the next heartbeat, they were gone.

Arriving outside the ward, Keith all but sprinted inside to see Shiro was sitting up slowly with a hand pressed to his side.  
“Hey! Take it easy!” Keith rushed, his hands reaching to stop the older from moving or sitting up too fast.  
“Relax Keith, I’m not going anywhere.” Shiro chuckled as he looked up to the other. “What happened? I don’t remember much after the shields dropped.” Shiro asked, glancing around the ward before frowning.  
“The ATLAS took a few ion rounds from the cruisers before we could get there and draw their fire. The commander center was hit, you were the only one there. You took the brunt of the blast.” Keith explained, his eyes dropping to the wound in Shiro’s ribcage. “They weren’t sure you were gonna pull through, Kashi.” Keith whispered, flicking violet eyes back up to the older.  
“I’m sorry to worry you, Keith. How are the others?” Shiro asked, though when he glanced out the door, his eyes hollowed. Keith glanced over his shoulder to see the other Paladins had returned to see how Shiro was doing.  
“Hey Shiro! Good to see you awake!”  
“Yeah, we were so worried about you!” Hunk cried as he rushed to the bed.  
“Whoa whoa! Take it easy, Hunk. He’s still healing.” Keith intervened, holding his arm out to stop the Yellow Paladin.  
“Oh! Sorry.”  
“I’m alright guys. I’ll be back in the fight before you know it.” Shiro smiled, but Keith could see how empty that smile really was.  
Was he the only one that noticed how cold he had become when the others were around him? Did anyone else not see how Shiro had started to close himself off from the others around him? Friends included. The only one who he genuinely smiled for was Keith and Kosmo.  
And that hurt Keith’s heart.  
But, weirdly, it also made him feel all that more special.  
“If you guys don’t mind, I need to rest a little bit more before I return to the command center, hmm?” Shiro asked as he pulled the covers back up over his frame.  
“Oh! Of course! We’ll get out of your hair.” Allura grinned and waved as they all vanished.  
All except Keith.  
“Keith. I’m fine, really.” Violet eyes hardened and narrowed on Shiro before he sighed.  
“Fine. Call me if you need anything. And I mean anything, Kashi.” Keith chided before he stood to leave the room.  
“I will. Promise.”  
A promise they both knew Shiro would never keep.


	3. Don't shut me out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, look at this guys!  
> I am enjoying this story way more than my other Voltron one. I'll try and keep the other one moving forward but I may just end up removing it and starting over. Not sure yet.  
> But, tell me what you guys think about this one. I am really digging this one a lot and totally going on a mad writing streak here~

Chapter Three: Don’t Shut Me Out

“How’s the war effort looking, Sam?” Shiro called as he stepped back into the command center. Voices gasped and Sam beamed wide.  
“With you back at the helm, looking better every second.” Sam chuckled as Iverson stood and saluted Shiro.  
“Captain, glad to have you back in one piece.” Shiro chuckled and nodded.  
“At ease, Iverson. Alright everyone, let’s get the ATLAS back into the fight.”

The trip to meet up with the rest of the rebels and freedom fighters was going to be a long journey without the use of the teladuv anymore.  
That was until Sam pointed out that they had been studying the teladuv and other means of travel and between him and Coran, they had managed to come up with a solution.  
And just like that, Voltron and the ATLAS had crossed the universe in a matter of minutes.  
“Wow Sam! That was incredible!” Shiro grinned as Coran and Sam laughed out loud.  
“Yeah, it was pretty exciting, wasn’t it? I can’t believe that actually worked!” Coran beamed as he patted the ATLAS gently.  
“Now, we are going to rendezvous with the freedom fighters here, at Olkarion. They have managed to build a force big enough to ward off any Galra cruisers and have been slowly outfitting other soldiers to get ready for the war. They are some of our strongest allies. The Blades are going to meet us there too.” Shiro looked up as Keith’s face flooded the screen.  
“Kolivan said that all of his Blades are there waiting for Voltron. They’ve been helping outfit the ships with the cloaking that Pidge gave them to use.”  
“I can’t wait to see what they’ve managed to do in all this time!” Pidge squealed.   
“Until we get there, guys, we need to be on high alert. We don’t know when the Galra will strike next, so everyone be ready. They could be on to us.” Shiro warned as they headed for Olkarion and the landing area they had found that was big enough for the ATLAS to land.

Once landed beside the Lions, everyone scattered out to check out the new alien planet and it’s inhabitants.  
Shiro lingered behind to make sure that all of the ATLAS landing procedures had been met before he ventured out to meet Rynar and her people.  
“Shiro? You coming?” Keith called as he stepped up to the command console.  
“I’ll be there shortly. I need to make sure that everything with the ATLAS is perfect before we get ready for another launch.” Keith wandered into the station and watched as Shiro worked before stepping closer and touching Shiro’s hand.  
“Come on. It can wait, Shiro. Let’s go meet up with everyone. It’s been a while since we’ve seen them all.” Keith urged and Shiro sighed before closing his eyes and nodding.  
“Alright. Let’s go meet up with everyone. It has been a while since I’ve seen some familiar faces.” Shiro grinned and walked down the hall while Keith watched him vanish.  
What was that supposed to mean? Familiar faces? Did Shiro believe that he wasn’t in the company of friends anymore? Did Shiro actually believe that there was no one left here for him to trust?  
That didn’t sit well in Keith’s stomach. Something cold and sharp dropped down into his gut and Keith sighed, closing his eyes and hoping that what he was feeling wasn’t actually true and that it was just his imagination. 

Shiro stepped out into the sunlight and blinked at how bright it was before his eyes adjusted. Hearing voices call his name, Shiro smiled and headed down towards the freedom fighters he recognized and was greeted with numerous hand shakes and hugs.  
“I’ve missed you guys, it’s been so long since I’ve seen anyone I know!” Shiro laughed as he hugged the aliens he knew.  
Keith watched from behind and frowned even more.  
His feeling was right. Shiro didn’t feel at home on Earth anymore. His life was now in space and that uncomfortable feeling settled in Keith’s stomach once more.

Krolia stepped down beside Keith and rest her hand on his shoulder.  
“Keith…..”  
“He doesn’t have a home on Earth anymore. He feels so much more comfortable out here in space.” Keith explained, looking up to the Galra before sighing. “We need to get everyone together and plan our next order of attack.” Keith headed down the ramp with Kosmo in tow behind him.

“The Galra are centered here. This is where we assume that Haggar is keeping her strongest weapon hidden. Which, we assume, means more Altean hostages.” Kolivan explained while everyone listened.  
“Are you sure, Kolivan?”  
“We haven’t had any visual confirmation, but word has spread about Haggar’s treatment of Altean prisoners.”  
“What’s our plan of attack?”  
“Getting to Haggar is the most important thing right now. I know the Altean’s are important, but unless we take out Haggar, this whole thing could happen all over again.” Keith explained as the others turned to listen to him. “We need to form some kind of large diversion to get Haggar to send her troops out to attack while the rest of us can sneak in and get to Haggar and the prisoners.”  
“I like that idea, Keith. The ATLAS is big enough to draw a lot of attention and with some of the freedom fighters backing us up, we should be bale to withstand a large scale attack.”  
“Shiro…” Keith started to voice his concern but bit his lips and swallowed it.   
“Okay. So everyone knows the plan. ATLAS will draw the brunt of the attack while a few cloaked fighters board the main cruiser to get to Haggar and the Altean prisoners.” Shiro said while Keith lowered his gaze from the Captain of the ATLAS and to the holographic map.  
This was not going to end well.

“Shiro!” Keith chased after the Captain and watched as the man turned when he heard his name called.  
“Keith, what is it?”  
“I don’t like this. You barely survived one attack with several Galra cruisers. And you’re still recovering from that ion blast. This isn’t a good idea.” Keith stressed, chewing on his bottom lip while looking up to the other.  
“It’ll be fine, Keith. Don’t worry.”  
“That’s what you said last time!” Keith snapped, the stress bleeding over in his voice while violet eyes pleaded with the Captain. “Please. Can’t we think of something else?”  
“We don’t have a whole lot of time, and the intel we have now is only for the current fleet movements. If we don’t strike now we could lose track of Haggar and the next time we find her it’ll be too late.” Shiro argued, steel eyes narrowing on the Voltron leader. “We don’t have the time or the manpower to get new information. We need to strike now.”  
Keith tried to sputter a response, but he couldn’t under those hard eyes. He simply bowed his head and frowned.  
“Alright. But I don’t like it.” Keith whispered. Shiro reached out and squeezed Keith’s shoulder with that trademark smile.  
“It’ll be fine, Keith. You’ll see.”

The attack had to be swift, Haggar’s fleet could leave at any second and they needed to make sure that they got to their locations before that happened.  
ATLAS was the first to arrive, wanting to offset the Galra fleet by arriving with such a massive ship that could rival Haggar’s own flagship.  
“Shields up to max! Get those cannons ready to fire! We need to provide cover fire for Voltron and our allies!” Shiro barked his orders while the Galra cruisers opened fire.  
“I think we’ve got their attention!” Coran shouted as he kept the ATLAS moving in the direction they needed.  
“Good! We need to make sure their focus stays on us. Voltron! You’re clear to go!” Shiro ordered and the Lions were zipping past the cruisers to get to Haggar’s flagship.  
“Be careful out there, Shiro.” Keith told him as they raced on past.

Boarding Haggar’s flagship was easier than anticipated, which only meant they were walking into a trap.  
They all knew that through experience.  
And Hagger was very good at her traps.  
The Paladins made their way quickly, looking for any signs of sentries or worse, her Druids.   
“I really don’t like that it’s this quiet.” Hunk whispered, eyes scanning the halls.  
“I know. I don’t even see any drones around here. It’s weird.” Pidge complained as she peeked around a corner.  
“I know guys, but we knew going into this that it could be a trap.” Keith assured as they continued to march deeper into the halls of Haggar’s ship.  
“We need to find the other Alteans.” Allura whispered as they stopped at a fork in the halls. “Which way?”  
“No. we all need to go after Haggar. Once we take her out, then we can search the ship for the prisoners.” Keith snapped, looking over his shoulder to the others. “She’s the bigger threat. The rest of us can deal with the Druids when the time comes. But Haggar is far too dangerous to not go after right now.” Allura wanted to argue, but she knew that Keith was right and just nodded.  
“Alright, you’re team leader Keith. I trust your judgement.” Allura agreed and Pidge pulled up the schematics.  
“Looks like the main chamber is this way.” Pidge pointed to the left and the Paladins vanished into the dark.

“Rrrggh! Veronica, how are the shields?!”  
“Holding at a steady 92 percent sir! The extra boost in power has been almost instantaneous in giving us the added power we needed.”  
“Iverson! Weapons charged?”  
“To the max and ready to fire.”  
“Give them hell, Commander!”  
“Aye aye Captain!” A barrage of cannon fire ripped from the hull of the ATLAS, shredding another cruiser in half.  
“How many more are out there!?”  
“At least two dozen more! Plus their fighters!”  
“Rynar! How are the pilots holding up?”  
“Well enough, Shiro! We’ve managed to keep the Galra fighters at bay with Matt and Sam’s help.”  
“Just doing what I can!” Matt called.  
“Captain! One of the cruisers is breaking off and headed towards the flagship!”  
“Keith! Looks like you’ve got incoming!” Shiro shouted over the comm.  
“Roger that, Shiro. We’ll be ready.” Keith turned to the Paladins following him and held his sword up. “Okay, looks like we may have to split up after all. Shiro just told me we’ve got a cruiser incoming. Allura, take Pidge and go get the Altean prisoners. Lance, Hunk, you’re with me. I’m gonna need all the covering fire we can manage.”  
“Copy that.” Pidge and Allura vanished back the way they had come while Keith continued to lead the other three towards the main chamber where Haggar waited for them.


	4. Leap of Faith

Chapter Four: Leap of Faith

“Keith. You really think Haggar is just in there waiting for us?” Lance asked as they continued their trek down the halls.  
“I don’t think she’s just waiting. I am sure she’s got a boat load of traps set for us and probably has her Druids waiting to take us out.”  
“Aw man. I hate those guys.” Hunk whined while holding his plasma cannon up. “Those guys suck.”  
Keith glanced over his shoulder to Hunk, only for violet eyes to widen as he saw the Druid.  
“Hunk! DUCK!” He snapped seconds before he was swinging his sword.  
Reflexes alone saved Hunk from Keith’s blade, but the Druid had vanished.  
“Damn it! Where’d he go?!” Keith snarled as he spun, Kosmo growling beside him. “Keep your eyes peeled, we know they’re here.” Keith warned, gripping his blade tight while trying to look into the dark.  
“Shit. I hate it when they do this! It pisses me off.” Lance growled, still gripping his rifle while Hunk spun in a circle.  
“Come on man. Where are they?” He whispered, screaming when the Druid appeared in front of him.  
“Hunk!” Keith threw his blade into the back of the Druid, only to cry out when talons raked up his spine.  
“Keith!!” Lance ran for the downed Paladin as Kosmo warped closer. “Come on, you alright man?” Lance asked while helping Keith back to his feet.  
“I will be. There’s another one here.” Keith hissed, scanning the dark.  
“How many are there?” Hunk growled, only to get swatted aside. “Aha!! Ow! Where’d that come from!?”  
“Little Paladins all alone.”  
“Damn, she’s here too.” Keith snarled, baring his fangs and gripping his sword. “Everyone, stay sharp! We need to kill her quickly.” Keith growled and charged when he saw her appear.  
She vanished and two more Druids took her place, hands held up as their magic shot from their palms.  
Keith rolled out of the way while Lance and Hunk provided covering fire.  
“Lance, behind you!” The Cuban rolled left to avoid the attack, spinning on his toes to fire at the Druid who vanished again.  
“Come on! That is so not fair!” Lance snarled.  
Keith knelt beside Kosmo and the wolf whined at the other before snarling. They warped around and chased after Haggar while Lance and Hunk managed to deal with the other Druids.  
“Come on Keith! We can’t keep this up foreve---aaaAAAHH!!” Lance screamed when struck by the Druids magic, crumpling into a heap while Hunk fired with his cannon.  
“Lance!” Hunk ran towards the fallen Paladin and was kneeling beside him. “Lance buddy, come on, say something.”  
“Ugh….Hunk….that you?” Lance managed before his eyes rolled into the back of his head once more.  
“Keith! Lance is out cold! I can’t protect him all myself!”  
Keith snarled and spun to see Hunk surrounded by five more Druids.  
He could hear Haggar laughing behind him, but Kosmo warped Keith over to Hunk, slashing at one with his blade, only to warp again to avoid the attack.  
“Hunk!”  
“Allura, Pidge! It’s so good to see you two!”  
“What happened to Lance?!” Allira asked as she sprinted towards the two other Paladins.  
“He was hit with some of that Druid magic. He’s unconscious right now, but I don’t know how bad it is.” Hunk explained, only to fire again on another Druid that appeared. “And these guys just keep popping out of nowhere!” He growled.  
“Allura, Pidge, keep them busy! I’m going after Haggar again!” Keith snapped as he raced towards Kosmo, who warped them after Haggar.  
“Damn it, Keith!” Pidge snarled.

“Matt! What’s the status of the freedom fighters?” Shiro called, feeling another ion cannon strike the shield.  
“Scattered, but managing to hold their own. With the MFE fighters helping clear the path, they seem to be doing well.”  
“Iverson, how are our weapons holding up?”  
“So far so good. They seem to be taking down Galra cruiser after cruiser.” Iverson beamed and patted the warm metal of the ATLAS.  
“Good. Keith, what’s your status?” Shiro frowned when he didn’t hear anything back from the Voltron leader. “Keith, can you hear me? Are you getting this?” Shiro narrowed his eyes before snapping his gaze to Coran.  
“Coran, are any of them transmitting?” A quick tap on his screen and Coran frowned.  
“I’m not getting anything from any of the Paladins.”  
“Haggar.” Shiro growled. “Iverson, you have command. I need to get down there and get to the Paladins.”  
“Sir, yes sir!” Iverson saluted as Shiro sprinted down the hall.  
“Sam! Get me a jet ready!”  
“You’ve got to be kidding me!”  
“Something to get me over the Haggar’s ship!”  
“I’ll come too. Keith is over there.” Krolia appeared beside the Captain and Shiro smiled.  
“Glad to have you on board, Krolia. How are the Blades doing on the ground.”  
“With the support from the freedom fighters, they seem to be holding their own against the flood of sentries and Galra.”  
“Good to hear. Sam, how’s my ship?” Shiro called as he sprinted into the landing bay.  
“Kolivan said he would take you guys over on his fighter, it’ll be faster than the Altean shuttle and be able to withstand the vacuum of space that our own fighters can’t.”  
“Good. Thanks Kolivan.” Shiro smiled at the taller Galran male, who simply nodded.  
“Let us go. We must get to Haggar quickly. I fear the very worst is yet to come.”

Keith snarled when Haggar continued to elude him, watching the witch dance in and out of his reach.  
After a brief moment to allow Kosmo a breath to recover from all the chasing did he realize he had been separated from the others.  
Which sent a shock of ice shooting up his spine.  
“Oh no….”  
“Oh yes indeed. Black Paladin.” Keith snarled and whirled with his blade swinging, cursing when he missed her yet again. “What a pitiful sight you are. Thrashing around in the dark. Even the Champion was better than you.”  
“Shiro was always better than me in every way! That’s why he could fight Zarkon for control of the Black Lion! And that’s why I am here instead of him! To fight you so he doesn’t have to! After all you’ve done to him, it’s only fair to take my turn with you.” Keith snarled, pivoting and swinging with his blade once more when he heard her horrible laughter behind him.  
“Good. Very good. You’ll do nicely.” Keith’s screams of anguish echoed in the hall.

“Diiiiiid you guys hear that….?” Pidge asked as she paused in her walking, turning her head around to find the source.  
“Hear what?” Lance asked after kicking the dead Druid.  
“It sounded like screaming. Like….Keith.” Pidge frowned, her eyes turning back to the others. Allura and Hunk blinked before straining to hear the same noise Pidge had heard.  
“LANCE!”  
“Wait, that sounds like….” Lance turned to see Shiro, Kolivan and Krolia sprinting towards them. “It is! Shiro, what are you doing here?!”  
“Where’s Keith?!”  
“We got separated. He went after Haggar while we dealt with the Druids.”  
“Damn it! Kolivan, where to?!” Shiro asked as he spun to face the older Blade member.  
“I don’t know. I am not sure where she would have taken him.”  
Kosmo suddenly appeared in a flash of Blue and rushed to Shiro.  
“Kosmo! Where’s Keith?!” The cosmic wolf whined and grabbed hold of Shiro’s arm, tugging him a few steps forward before they zapped away.  
“You’ve got to be kidding me!” Lance shouted, throwing his hands up in the air.  
“Come on! We need to find out where they are so we can help them.” Krolia snapped as she raced forward down the hall.

Shiro was a little disoriented when he arrived, but the laughter that echoed in the dark all but snapped his body into defensive mode.  
“Haggar.”  
“Champion. So good to see you again.” Haggar sneered as she appeared in front of him, holding Keith by his throat.  
“KEITH!” The Leader stirred and moaned a little, but no more than that as blood dripped down his fingers from a gouge in his arm. “Let him go!” Shiro snarled and his arm flared purple, ready to attack.  
Haggar simply sneered and tapped Keith’s spine, igniting the wound that a Druid had inflicted earlier. Keith howled in pain and arched against the agony that coursed through his frame.  
“I’ll only let him go if you willingly come with me, Champion.” Haggar held her hand out for Shiro and the other backed a step before looking to Keith.  
He couldn’t leave him in the hands of this witch. He knew what she would do to him and he didn’t want that for Keith.  
Steeling his emotions away and petting the top of Kosmo’s head once more, Shiro straightened and narrowed his eyes on Haggar.  
“Fine.” Haggar’s maniacal laughter echoed I the chamber and Keith was dropped to the floor.  
Cold hands suddenly scrapped across Shiro’s throat and he did his best not to flinch at her touch.  
“I have someone who has been dying to meet you again.” Hagger hissed in his ear before tapping the prosthetic joint on Shiro’s shoulder.  
Purple lightening shot up his arm and Shiro screamed in agony, dropping to his knees and grasping the joint in anguish.  
“But we’ll have to get you a better upgrade first.” She sneered, touching the joint again and eliciting another shriek from the Captain.

Keith thought he could hear screaming near him, along with something warm and wet across his face.  
“….Kosmo….?” Keith whispered weakly, looking up to see the cosmic wolf above him.  
It was then that Keith registered that it was Shiro who was screaming. Keith somehow managed to drag himself up to his feet and glance up to see Haggar breaking apart Shiro’s prosthetic arm.  
“Shiro! Leave him alone!”  
“Silence fool! He surrendered himself for you! Be grateful I do not exterminate you!” She howled and Keith grit his teeth as he watched the pair vanish.  
A cry left his lips and Keith fell to his knees once again, a sob caught in his throat while tears spilled down his cheeks.  
“No….Shiro…” Keith cupped his hand over his lips while running footsteps charged into the clearing.  
“KEITH!” It was Lance that reached him first, sliding to his knees beside the other, gripping to Keith’s hands tight. “What happened?!”  
“Haggar…..Haggar has Shiro….” Keith managed, voice breaking as Kosmo whined, curling around his master.


	5. In Times like these

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, this is a non-con warning! I'm letting you all know now! If you don't want to read it, just skip ahead to the next chapter. There isn't a whole lot going on except for Sendak and Shiro smut. Rape smut, but smut.  
> Just warning you now!  
> And as always, dears, do enjoy~

Chapter Five: In Times Like These

When Shiro woke again, he was in an unfamiliar area. He could feel the heavy chains around his ankles and wrist, keeping him from making any attempt to run. That, combined with the loss of his prosthetic arm, made him weaker than usual and that really pissed off the Captain.  
“Haggar! What do you want?!” Shiro bellowed, glaring at the cell door as he managed to drag himself up from the floor.  
“It isn’t her you should be worried about.” That voice flooded the dark and Shiro felt a shot of ice lance up his spine.  
No way he was still alive. He had died on that ship, hadn’t he? Keith had killed him!  
When the cell door slid open, Shiro felt fear freeze him in place.  
“Sendak.” Shiro managed to snarl out and the Galran Commander laughed at the reaction.  
“Look at you, frozen in fear at my mere presence. I am so glad I’ve left such an impression on you!” Sendak snapped his hand forward and grabbed Shiro by the throat, dragging the former Paladin closer and watching the Captain struggle against him.  
“I am not afraid of you, Sendak!” Shiro snarled in response as he fought against the Galran Commander. The other let out a bark of a laugh and leaned until Shiro’s face was inches from Sendak’s.  
“You will be, Shiro. You will be.”

The Paladins had searched the entire ship for any traces of Shiro or of Haggar. Krolia and Kolivan couldn’t sense anything, and neither could Allura.  
It made Keith twitch and snappy, knowing that Shiro was enduring a vast amount of torture just because the witch could.  
Hissing out another curse, Keith spun and punched the wall, making everyone stop and regard the other.  
“I shouldn’t have let him go! I should have gone after him! It’s all my fault!”  
“Don’t worry Keith. We’ll find him. Soon enough.” Pidge tried to assure her comrade and friend, but Keith wasn’t having it.  
The Paladin leader was clearly upset and not taking any advice from anyone.  
And when the trail turned up cold, all Keith could do was curse Haggar and scream until his body gave.  
Almost sagging to the floor, Keith felt arms scoop him up and he flicked his violet gaze up to his mother.  
“Don’t give up yet. We’ll find him. Just give us time.” She purred and Keith relaxed in her hold, fighting back his tears until they were just too much. They spilled down his cheeks as Kosmo whined again, sitting beside the pair until Keith had calmed down enough.  
“We need to get back to the ATLAS. Let Iverson know what’s happened.” Lance called, looking around the empty ship before sighing. “We need a plan….”

Another scream tore from Shiro’s already raw lungs, feeling his throat burn as he cried out in pain.  
“I’ve always wanted to try this with you, but Zarkon didn’t want to damage you too badly. Not when you became the only way to find the Black Lion. But now, that isn’t the case is it? You’ve been replaced.” Sendak snarled in Shiro’s ear, grinning his fanged sneer while Shiro gasped for air.  
“Well….at least I’m not….someone’s…puppet….” Shiro managed to choke out, looking up to Sendak before his head lolled to the side once more.  
A deep snarl echoed in Sendak’s chest and he shifted, grabbing Shiro’s legs and parting them.  
“What….what are you doing?” Shiro demanded, the motion drawing him out of his pain induced haze. “What are you planning, Sendak?”  
“To humiliate you and to break you.” Sendak smirked before talons shred clothing from Shiro’s frame. Shiro fought and struggled against the straps holding him in place, trying to get Sendak to stop touching him in such a manner. “I’ve always wanted to destroy the Champion like this. To ruin you like this.” Sendak thrummed as Shiro gasped hard, his chest heaving with the short gulps of air.  
“Don’t. Don’t do this…..please….” Shiro begged, watching Sendak run his clawed fingers across the Champion’s scarred flesh.  
“Begging me now, are we? Too late. This is going to happen, Champion. I will break you, one way or another.” Claws dragged their way across now exposed flesh and Shiro sucked in a breath, closing his eyes and willing everything away.  
But those hands persisted and soon became harder and more demanding. Gently plucking at pert nipples, Sendak watched as Shiro struggled to not react to the feeling.  
There was an obvious flush rising to the Champion’s cheeks and Sendak grinned, fangs exposed as he pressed even more.  
Dragging a rough tongue across the obviously sensitive pink mounds, Sendak watched as Shiro arched into the touch with a cry, tears spilling down those cheeks as he shook his head.  
“…don’t…don’t….don’t do this….please…” Shiro begged, but Sendak ignored those pleas. The Captain thrashed against those hands as they held his body in place. Fingers dipped and teased and traced, looking for all and any sensitive places Shiro may be hiding.  
And his body reacted against his will, arching into those cold hands, making his ever increasing erection harder.  
“Well, it seems your body is enjoying this, even if your mind is not. Tell me, Champion, have you ever been fucked by a Galra?” Sendak sneered, crude and foul as he dragged his tongue across those tear stained cheeks.  
Shiro shook his head and tried one more desperate attempt to kick Sendak away.  
But that metal claw caught his ankle and only pull his legs even farther apart. The burn forced Shiro to scream again as he arched against the table he was strapped to.  
“Now now. The more you fight, the more it will hurt.” Sendak thrummed before exposing his own cock. Shiro balked at the size, there was no way that was going to fit inside him!  
“No! That won’t fit----you can’t possible think that….!” Shiro squirmed, trying to break himself free of the straps again even as Sendak held him tight.  
“Oh don’t worry. I’ll make sure you’re loose enough first.” Fingers were suddenly pressed against his entrance and Shiro hissed, hips jerking at the sensation as one slowly eased inside.  
Shiro bit his lips and struggled against the building pain as Sendak spread Shiro enough to take is cock.  
“Stop! It hurts! I can’t!” Shiro cried, thrashing some more and looking up to Sendak with glossy eyes.  
“I’ve only inserted one finger, Champion. You’ll have to endure more before we even get to my cock size.” Sendak chuckled while slowly stroking his finger along the clenching walls of Shiro’s entrance.  
A moan was ripped from Shiro’s lungs, unable to stop it when that finger found his prostate.  
“Ah, there it is.” Sendak thrummed and stroked the sensitive bundle of nerves before adding a second finger.  
Which had Shiro screaming yet again, arching off the table as stars flooded his vision.  
Panting hard as saliva spilled from his clenched jaw, Shiro glared up at Sendak as best as he could manage give the situation he was currently in. A low ripple of laughter escaped Sendak’s lips as he watched Shiro continue to struggle against him.  
Spreading his fingers inside the other, Sendak continued to work the Champion loose despite the screams that erupted from Shiro. More tears flooded his vision and he thrashed again until a cool hand found his erection, stroking it languidly.  
Shiro shuddered at the touch, gritting his teeth to try and combat the slow burn of pleasure.  
“Stop! Don’t touch me!” Shiro fought against Sendak, but those fingers persisted and scissored until Sendak was content with how loose Shiro was. “Don’t….Don’t, Sendak, it won’t fit! You’ll tear me! Senda----AAAAAHHHH!” Shiro bellowed in anguish as Sendak shoved his cock inside the other, tears falling down his face as he sobbed in pain.  
A pleased rumble left Sendak’s lips and he leaned across the Champion, grinning down at the human.  
“And you said it wouldn’t fit.” Sendak chuckled, rolling his hips into the other, forcing Shiro to gasp and cry out each time.  
The pain was immense, causing Shiro to nearly black out at the extreme feeling. He was gasping hard, feeling as though all of his insides had been shoved into his lungs, making it hard to even breathe.  
His hand clenched and loosened each time Sendak rolled his hips as deep as he could press into Shiro, leaning to lap at the tears that had spilled from the Champion.  
“Look at you, taking my cock so well.”  
“…..fuck….you….” Shiro managed to snarl in between his short drags of air. A hard thrust up had Shiro’s back bowing, screaming again and breaking the strap holding his arm down. He reached up and clawed at Sendak, holding to the other and sobbing at the pain.  
“Look at you, clinging to me like some female in the throes of pleasure.” Shiro couldn’t even manage to snap back, lost in his pain as Sendak continued the brutal thrusts into the other.  
“…stop…please…I can’t….you’re tearing me…..please….” Shiro sobbed, those tears still spilling down his cheeks as he choked on his air.  
Sendak reached and snapped the rest of the straps, hiking Shiro’s legs up until his thighs were spread and pressed against his stomach. Which had Shiro crying out again, clawing at Sendak even more.  
“NO! PLEASE!” Shiro sobbed, reaching down to press his fingers against Sendak’s abdomen in a desperate attempt to stop the Galra.  
But Sendak continued and Shiro arched against the table, screaming until his voice was raw and his throat sore.  
The brutal thrusts soon slowed and Shiro keened, pressing his hand to his stomach when he felt Sendak finally stop and release his seed deep inside the Champion.  
Pulling back, Sendak smirked at the mess he had made of the Champion, covered in his come and Shiro’s own blood, Sendak laughed and left the Druids to clean the mess.  
Curling into the table and sobbing, Shiro tried to salvage what little he had left for garments to save a shred of his modesty.  
And he continued his anguished cries as the Druids cleaned the human of the mess Sendak had left.

“Where do you think she would have taken him?” Keith asked as he glanced up to his comrades and fellow Paladins.  
“I don’t know. Daibazaal maybe?” Lance shrugged and Allura shook her head.  
“No. Too obvious. There has to be another place.” They all frowned and Allura glanced to her team. “While you guys continue to figure out where they have taken Shiro, I need to see to the Alteans. Let me know when you have news.” Keith watched Allura leave the room and he frowned before pushing from the wall.  
“I’m going to go talk to Krolia and Kolivan. Maybe they have an idea of where Haggar may have taken Shiro.” Keith finally said, Kosmo standing and following after the other.

When Keith found Krolia, she was sitting with a few Blades and Krolivan, sipping on their drinks while Sam and Iverson spoke.  
“Maybe the Alteans know.” Sam explained, looking over to the group before Iverson shook his head.  
“The Princess already tried to speak with them. They don’t remember a thing.” Iverson sighed, closing his eyes. “There has to be a clue we’re missing somewhere.” He growled.  
Keith sat beside Krolia and she purred for her kit, stroking his back as he frowned.  
“I can’t even imagine what’s being done to him right now.” He whispered as Krolia wrapped her arms around him.  
“He’s strong. He’ll make it through this.”  
Kolivan had been silent this entire time, mulling over all of the information he had gathered and slowly, his eyes opened.  
“What about Zarkon’s destroyed base?” All eyes turned to Kolivan as the Blade Leader spoke. “It would have everything she needs. And because it’s destroyed, no one would think to look there.” Keith was on his feet and looking to Iverson and Sam.  
“We need to go then! To Zarkon’s main base!” Keith said, turning to race for his Lion.  
“Keith! Ahhh, yeah. I agree with the kid. We need to get the ATLAS ready for flight. Tell the Paladins that’s where we’re headed.” Krolia and Kolivan nodded before following Keith to where the Lions were being held.  
“Guys! We may have a lead on where Shiro is!”  
“Where?” Lance asked while leaping to his feet.  
“Zarkon’s old base. It’s a long shot but Kolivan believes that’s where Haggar may be headed.” Keith said while grabbing his helmet and pulling it on. “We’re getting ready to head there now.”  
Allura and Pidge glanced to each other before they nodded, grabbing their gear and pulling their helmets on.  
“We’re ready to follow your lead, Keith.” The other nodded and they all were soon set in their Lions, ready for the fight.

Shiro had lost track of time since he had been here. How long had he been gone? Where had they taken him?  
Shifting on the cold floor with a pained hiss, Shiro managed to drag himself up part way without applying pressure to his rear.  
He still hadn’t recovered since Sendak’s brutal attack, and Shiro wasn’t sure he ever would. Mentally anyways.  
A choked sob caught in his throat and he struggled to keep it back, but tears spilled and he cursed himself for being so weak.  
The Druids had given him a different set of clothes and Shiro had managed to dress himself without falling over. He was still in a great deal of pain, confirming that Sendak had, in fact, torn him a great deal.  
The door hissed open and Shiro bared his teeth to see Sendak saunter in.  
“How’s the Champion holding up?” He snarled, grinning at the human as Shiro hissed back at him.  
“How long have I been here, Sendak?”  
“Almost 2 Vargas.” Sendak thrummed and Shiro blinked at the Galra before his eyes fell.  
“Almost two days.” Sendak reached down and grabbed Shiro by the collar of his clothes, dragging the human up and grinning.  
“No one is going to save you, Champion. You’re my slave now, to use as I see fit. Whether to fuck you into oblivion or use you as an outlet for my rage, you are mine now. Do as you’re told and I’ll reward you. Fight me and I’ll continue to punish you.” Shiro growled at the large Galra and tried to kick at the other, but the bout of agony had him gasping in result.  
“I’m never going to listen to you, no matter what!”  
“Then punishment it is.” Sendak dropped Shiro and the human cried out, curling away from Sendak and backing across the floor of the cell.  
Sendak grabbed Shiro’s ankle and pulled him across the floor, growling as Shiro fought against him.  
“Good! Keep fighting me! It’ll be that much sweeter when I break you!” Sendak bellowed while spinning Shiro to his stomach. Bracing his only arm against the cold floor, Shiro hissed as his trousers were ripped from his waist.  
“Sendak! Don’t! You can’t use me again!” Shiro pleaded, steel eyes going wide as he watched the Galra lick his lips.  
“I told you this was punishment.” Sendak snarled, dragging Shiro closer, even as the man screamed for him not to.  
“You already tore me once! You can’t do it again, you’ll kill me!” Shiro begged, clawing at the floor as Sendak pulled his cock free once again.  
“I never knew you could beg like this, Champion. It’s pleasing to know something terrifies you.” Sendak thrummed as Shiro gasped into the floor, tears spilling beyond his control.  
A large, cold hand traced claws across Shiro’s spine and the man shuddered, gasping when those sharp talons found his nipples again. Shiro’s body trembled against his will and he tried to struggle against Sendak once again.  
There was a shift in movement behind him and Shiro glanced back, only for his eyes to go wide as Sendak lined his cock to Shiro’s abused hole.  
“Sendak—Don’t—Plea---AAAAAHHHHHH!!!” Shiro collapsed against the floor, sobbing outright in anguish as Sendak once again sheathed his cock inside of Shiro.  
“That’ wasn’t so bad, now was it?” Sendak thrummed, laughing at the broken noises coming from the Champion underneath him.  
That taut form trembled and shook as Shiro cried and screamed into the metal floor each time Sendak thrust inside of him.  
“….please….no more…I can’t….” Shiro whined, begging the Galra to stop the abuse.  
“This is what happens when you don’t do as I say, slave. This is your punishment.” Sendak growled and Shiro cried out when the pace became faster and harder. His body couldn’t take much more of this. Sendak was going to kill him!  
The abuse carried on for what seemed like lifetimes to Shiro, tearing and ripping Shiro even more that he already was.  
Nails dragging across the metal floor, Shiro sobbed in pain as Sendak eventually slowed to drag his cock along the inside of Shiro. Claws soon dug into Shiro’s hips, drawing blood as Sendak once again spilled himself inside of Shiro.  
Pulling free from the human, Sendak watched as Shiro collapsed onto the floor and slipped unconscious due to the agony he endured. The Galra chuckled and fixed himself before leaving the cell, telling the Druids what needed to be done.


	6. Broken Soldier

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I warned you. There was going to be angst. I told you it was coming and now here we are just getting warmed up. I'm not done yet. I've still got loads more to come before any of you get the fluffy, smuttyness you all want~  
> Don't worry, the fluffy is coming, but Shiro and Keith need to suffer more, yeeeessssss.  
> Get those tissues ready and hold tight for a roller coaster of emotions~!  
> And no killing the author. The Plot Bunnies made me do it!

Chapter Six: Broken Soldier

Keith was gripping tight to the controls on Black, his knuckles almost white with worry and stress.  
What were they doing to him? What was Haggar’s plans? Why did they need Shiro and not him?!  
Black purred in response to Keith’s obvious anguish as Kosmo whined beside him.  
“We need to hurry. I don’t like the idea of Haggar keeping Shiro as long as she has.”  
“We know, Keith. We’re moving as fast as we can.” Sam assured him over the comm as the ATLAS continued her desperate journey to save her Captain.

When Shiro woke, his whole body screamed at every motion he made. He could feel the cuts and bruises from Sendak, drawing a low growl from his lungs as he shifted away from the majority of the pain.  
The cold floor was no comfort to his agony as Shiro struggled to find a position where he was comfortable enough to where he didn’t want to scream in pain.  
Shiro wanted to sob outright, but his pride was still intact and he stared up at the walls around him, gritting his teeth while he tried to think of some kind of escape plan.  
But he saw no way. Not with how weak his body had become, Sendak had made sure that Shiro had no strength to fight back.  
It was frustrating and humiliating to be resorted to some sex slave for Sendak until he became useless. That was not a fate Shiro was willing to wait around for and he needed to find a way to get out. He didn’t want to rely on the Paladin’s finding him before Sendak actually broke the Champion.  
He had come too close already.  
The agony of their coupling had forced Shiro to a sobbing, whimpering mess that begged for relief in any form.  
It made the Champion shudder at the thought of another round, feeling bile build until Shiro had to spin to retch against the metal floor.  
He couldn’t keep doing this.  
Every time Sendak stepped through those doors, Shiro knew what was going to happen and sooner or later, Shiro was going to do as told rather than suffer the consequences of fighting back. Shiro knew Sendak was breaking him down, little by little and it wouldn’t be long until there was nothing left.  
Shiro needed to find a way out.  
Soon.  
The doors hissed open and steel eyes fluttered up before they widened once more.  
“Champion.” Came Sendak’s snarl.

“We’re coming up on the base now. Searching for life signs.” Pidge called as the ATLAS slowed to a stop while the Green Paladin worked her magic. “There! I’ve got a lot of activity down there!” Pidge called as the fighters soon were launched for their attack. “Oh boy! They know we’re here! Keith, orders?”  
“Take out as many fighters as we can. We need to get down to the base and find Shiro. And anyone else who needs our help along the way!” Keith called as Black launched forward to take out as many fighters as he could. The others were close behind them as they cleared their way to the base.

Shiro was gasping, sobbing hard as he clawed at Sendak, struggling to keep his mind from giving in to the pain and keep himself from loosing consciousness.  
Those hard thrusts drew sharp cries from the Champion as he Sendak gripped his hips in a bruising, bloody hold.  
“You’re loosing, Champion. I can see it.” Steel eyes fluttered up to Sendak and rolled as Shiro grit his teeth.  
Sendak was right, he was slipping.  
Another hard thrust had Shiro arching, clawing at Sendak as a cool hand began to stroke Shiro’s straining erection.  
He couldn’t believe his body was becoming accustomed to this! That he was actually getting hard!  
“….don’t….please…..” Shiro begged as Sendak continued those slow pumps, feeling that creeping orgasm losing in.  
He didn’t want this! He didn’t want to come by Sendak’s hand!  
Another deep, hard piston of Sendak’s hips and Shiro screamed into his brutal peak, eyes rolling into the back of his head before his rigid body went lax.  
Gasping hard, steel eyes managed to peel open, but they were hollow and glazed. Takashi Shirogane was no longer there, having locked himself away to keep what little shred of self he had left.  
And Sendak’s maniacal laughter echoed in the cell while he continued his rough pace.

The Lions managed to land inside the base and Keith was the first out, rushing the sentries with a bellow of rage, Kosmo chasing behind him.  
“KEITH!” Allura cried, watching the other Paladin charge into the fray. “We have to stick together!”  
“I know.” Keith paused once the sentries were down, panting hard and looking back to the others. “Come on. We need to hurry.” Keith urged, looking down the hall at the sound of more sentries charging in on their location.  
Lance and Hunk were right beside him, firing into the dark while Pidge scanned for Shiro, trying to track him as best as she could.  
“There are several people in the cells! I don’t know which one is him, so we may have to break them all out!” Pidge cried, ducking under a shot and glaring down the hall. “STOP SHOOTING WHILE I’M TALKING!” She snapped as Lance fired its head off.  
“Then give us a heading, Pidge, and we’ll start there.” Keith snarled, his shield flaring to life as Kosmo warped them behind the line of sentries.  
“We need to go down this hall!” Pidge pointed towards the one that Keith was fighting in while Lance and Hunk fired upon the sentries.  
“Come on! Let’s go!” Lance spun to sprint down the hall to catch up with Keith as Pidge and the others followed after.

He wasn’t sure how long it took, but they finally reached the hall with all the prisoners trapped.  
“SHIRO!” Keith called, only for Lance to slap his hand over the other Paladin’s mouth.  
“Are you crazy?! You’re going to give our position away!”  
“They already know we’re here, Lance! And they know why we’re here, so the faster we find Shiro, the sooner we get out of here!” Keith hissed back and Lance opened his mouth to protest, but slowly shut his jaw and frowned.  
“Okay, you have a point.” He shrugged and they slowly started to walk down the hall, opening the cell doors as they continued.  
Questions were asked, thanks were given and prisoners were fleeing the base.  
It wasn’t until the last cell did they realize how much trouble they were really in.  
“Holy shit….” Lance backed a step away as Keith let out a low snarl.  
“Sendak. Should have known you’d be involved in this.” Keith bared his teeth, Galra yellow eyes flaring at the other male.  
“Well well well. If it isn’t the band of little, weak Paladins. I’m afraid you’re already too late.” Sendak patted the cell door and it creaked open, exposing what lay hidden beyond.  
What had once been the Champion of the Gladiator ring now lay on his side, back to the door in nothing but a collar and chain. He lay bare, exposing all of the abuse and torture he had endured. Even the bruising around his hips and the tearing of his entrance.  
It was clear exactly what had been done to Shiro.  
Which sent the young half breed into a fury he had never known.  
Screaming with unbridled rage, Keith launched into a frenzy, wild swings striking Sendak. Who was laughing and blocking each attack.  
“Good! Very good! Keep it up, half breed! You may even land a hit on me! But the Champion is mine now. And he’ll do exactly as I ask.” Sendak sneered as he gripped to Keith’s blade, having stopped it with his metal claw.  
“Give. Him. Back.” Keith gnashed out, yellow eyes narrowed on Sendak before the Galran male bellowed a laugh and threw Keith across the room.  
“Just try and take him from me!” Sendak challenged, holding his arm up to block the attacks from Hunk and Lance. “Pathetic!” He frowned, spinning to face the pair and launch his arm to take them both out easily.  
Allura rolled to the left and Keith was back on his feet, charging the larger Galra with a screech.  
Sendak swung with his fist, only to blink when he met air. Kosmo popped up behind him and Keith sliced with his blade, managing a glancing blow as Sendak turned to defend.  
“Oh! Very good, half breed!” Sendak laughed, mechanical eye scanning for the pair.  
They continued their dance for what seemed like hours. Keith popping around Sendak with Kosmo while Hunk and Lance pressed their attack despite Sendak’s ability to deflect them.  
It wasn’t long after that Keith finally managed a final blow, removing the head from the snake.  
He didn’t even wait a heartbeat before he was running towards Shiro, hands out to grasp the older as tears rushed down his face.  
“Shiro! Shiro, please…answer me….” Keith begged as eyes fluttered open. Empty grey eyes stared up at Keith before a soft noise left those lips.  
And Keith’s heart broke.  
Sendak had completed his goal all along.  
He had broken the Champion.  
Keith hugged Shiro close before scanning for something to drape Shiro in.  
“Lance, find him something to wear. Something I can wrap him in.” Keith ordered while fighting with the collar around Shiro’s throat.  
The Paladins scattered to find something and Allura came back with a tattered blanket from another cell. It was old and musky, but it covered Shiro well enough.  
Keith then tried to urge Shiro to stand, but there was no response from the other.  
“Hunk. You and I are going to have to carry him back to the Lions. Pidge; you, Allura and Lance are going to have to protect us along the way.” Keith explained as the Yellow Paladin came over to help lift Shiro to his feet.  
“We need to move quickly. I fear what Haggar is planning and we’re vulnerable right now with Shiro.” Allura hissed as she scanned the dark for any signs of movement.  
“I know. It’s going to be tough. But we have to get Shiro back.” Keith whispered, glossy eyes falling to the empty shell that harbored Shiro. “We have to….”

The trip back to the Lions was arduous and tedious. Sentries stopped them at every corner and fired rapidly on them.  
Lance and Allura did beautifully protecting Shiro, Hunk and Keith while Pidge managed to do most of the close combat. Having the turrets offline also proved extremely useful.  
But they had managed and Keith was loading Shiro into the Black Lion.  
“Let’s move, guys! We need to get out of here!”  
“Wait! Shouldn’t we set off a bomb or something inside the base?!” Allura cried, turning Blue around to look back.  
“No time!” Keith argued, desperate the get Shiro back to the ATLAS.  
“Don’t worry, I already uploaded a virus into the computers anyways! They won’t be able to hack it or use anything in the base! We can come back later and pick up the pieces.” Pidge explained as the Green Lion zipped past them.  
“Oh Pidge! You’re a genius!” Allura beamed, chasing after the others.  
Keith was straining against the controls, white knuckling them as he pushed Black as fast as she could go.  
“KOLIVAN! SAM!” Keith bellowed the second Black landed in the bay, grabbing the weight that was Shiro and half carrying him, half dragging him out as Kolivan and Sam raced towards them.  
“Oh…..god…” Sam whispered, hands trembling as they covered his mouth. “What….?”  
“You don’t want to know.” Keith growled as Kolivan took the extra weight and helped Keith carry the Captain to the medical bay.  
The Captain was instantly rushed in to the emergency ward and was kept under constant supervision while Keith refused to leave the waiting room.  
He could hear the rapid mechanical beeping from all the machines Shiro was connected to and it drove Keith insane just waiting.  
Krolia and Kosmo had sat with him while the other Paladins came and went.  
Days went on with no change in Shiro. He was healing, but still unconscious and unresponsive to any stimuli treatment.  
“What about Quintessence?” Allura finally asked as she watched through the window. An exhausted Keith pulled his eyes up to the Altean Princess and made a face before looking to Sam.  
“They’ve tried everything else. It couldn’t hurt.” Sam shrugged his shoulders and Keith dragged himself to his feet.  
“Where can we get it?”  
“Here. We have some here. From the Alteans and some of our allies. I can use it to spread it through his body. Speed up the healing process rapidly. It may help pull him from his unconscious state.” Allura whispered, looking back to the obviously fatigued Keith.   
He pulled in a slow breath and nodded.  
“Whatever it takes.” Keith murmured while he stepped up to the glass and pressed his hand against the cool of it. “Whatever it takes to bring him back.”

With Allura being the only one able to handle the Quintessence safely with no risk to herself, she and Romelle where the only ones allowed inside the room where they kept Shiro under hawk like supervision.   
It took only a matter of seconds, but all of Shiro’s physical wounds had healed with the Quintessence that now spread through his frame. With the powerful essence, it made Shiro’s skin glow a light shimmer, appearing almost angel like to the eye.  
Allura had taken a step back, watching Shiro before looking to the window where Keith watched eagerly.  
“It’ll take some time for him to wake, but at least he won’t be in any pain when he does.” Allura smiled and turned to leave. “You should be able to go in now and sit with him.” Allura held the door open as Keith made his way into the room to take the only empty chair.  
Krolia stood beside him and squeezed her kit’s shoulder.  
“Time. Give him time. We can’t even imagine what he had to endure.” She explained and Keith nodded, reaching to take Shiro’s only hand. Haggar had seen to destroying the prosthetic one before taking Shiro to Sendak.  
“Please Shiro. Please wake up soon.”


	7. Remember Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here comes more angst. We're getting into it now!   
> Do enjoy it, my loves~! I am having the best time writing this and I hope you are all enjoying reading it as much as I am writing it~

Chapter Seven: Remember Me

“We have to keep going without him.” Iverson said as he spoke to the Paladins, Sam and the others. Keith was leaning back against the wall and a low growl left his lips.  
He was exhausted. He hadn’t slept since they had brought Shiro back  
“It’s clear he’s not waking anytime soon.”  
“You don’t know that!” Keith snapped his retort and Iverson softened is expression.  
“We all hope for the Captain to wake soon, but God only knows what they did to him on that ship. We need to move forward and take out the remaining threat. Mainly Haggar.” Iverson explained and another low growl rippled from between Keith’s lips. That hag had been behind Shiro’s torture. And Keith wanted nothing more than to rip her to shreds.  
Taking note of Keith’s distress, Krolia reached over and rest her hand on his shoulder. It was obvious the other was upset and angered over what had happened.  
“Keith….”  
“It should have been me! Not Shiro! He has already suffered enough at that witch’s hands! I should have taken the brunt of the attack! The torture!” Keith barked before turning away to head back to the med bay to sit with the Captain once more.  
Lance sighed and glanced to Allura.  
“He’s not handling this well.” Allura murmured.  
“Can you blame him? After all Shiro has endured, now this? I’m upset over it too! It should have been one of us, not Shiro again!” Lance snapped back before closing his eyes. “It should have been one of us instead….” Lance whispered as he shook his head.

Veronica had met Keith in the hall, her eyes dark as she studied the other.  
“What?!” Keith felt his heart leap to his throat while she searched for words to explain what she had discovered.  
“He’s awake….but---!” She grabbed Keith’s arm when the other started to run past her. “Wait! Keith, let me explain!” She cried and Keith paused to face her.  
“Make it fast.”  
“It’s not him! You have to understand. Shiro’s not there!” She explained and Keith studied her before he felt his legs quake under him. Grabbing at the wall, Keith fell back against it as Veronica reached to catch him.  
“What do you mean?”  
“Shiro must have locked himself away to protect himself from the abuse he suffered. It’s a tactic people who suffer from PTSD manage to perfect so they don’t have to endure the pain anymore. Shiro is a prime example of that. He’s endured torture before and managed to walk away mostly intact. This….this was worse and he had to protect himself. I don’t know when he’ll be the same again. This…..this is really bad.” Veronica explained as Keith closed his eyes to combat the tears building.  
No. He had lost Shiro all over again.  
Covering his face with his hands, Keith struggled not to outright sob in front of Veronica, gasping at the choked noises leaving his lungs.  
Knowing how difficult and painful this was for the other, Veronica reached and pulled Keith into a gentle hug.  
“He’ll pull through. He just needs time.” Veronica explained as Keith pressed into her, unable to mask those tears falling. “You should go see him. It will be good for him to see a familiar face…..just don’t be upset when he doesn’t recognize you.” Veronica offered and Keith nodded, wiping his tears away and looking up to the older femme.  
“Do I look okay?” Keith asked and Veronica gave him a smile.   
“You look tired, but he’ll understand. You’ve been working so hard for everyone and picking up all the slack. No one is judging you.” She smiled as she brushed Keith’s hair back a little before pushing him forward. “Go on.” She urged and Keith was headed down the hall to the med bay where the Captain sat, looking around with empty eyes.  
Keith stepped into the room and felt his heart still in his chest.  
She was right. This wasn’t Shiro. This was an empty shell of the Captain and former Leader of Voltron.  
Keith swallowed hard and crossed the room, managing a smile when those hollow eyes turned to him.  
“Hey Kashi. I cam to see how you were.” Keith hummed as he sat in the chair next to the bed. Shiro blinked at him before those eyes scanned the room again.  
“Kashi?” Shiro’s voice echoed and Keith flinched before reaching for Shiro’s hand.  
“Yeah. Kashi is what I call you. Takashi Shirogane.” Keith smiled as the other lowered his gaze back to Keith. “I always call you Kashi instead of Shiro most of the time anyways. It’s what Adam used to call you.” Keith explained, waiting for a reaction that never came.  
Not even Adam’s name could bring any sort of emotion from the other.  
Keith frowned and squeezed that hand a little tighter.  
“We need you to come back, Kashi. We can’t do this without you.” Keith whispered, dropping his head to the sheets as a new wave of tears struck him.  
Steel eyes fell to the weeping man and studied him before reaching to touch those limp onyx curls that framed Keith’s face. Violet eyes fluttered up as Shiro toyed with Keith’s long hair before his hand fell away.  
He didn’t even seem upset by the fact that Haggar had destroyed his prosthetic and was simply used to having one arm instead.  
“Please Kashi…..please come back to me….” Keith whispered, taking that hand in his own and kissing the knuckles. “I need you.” Keith breathed as Takashi studied him for a bit longer before looking up as the doctors returned.  
“Oh, Paladin Keith. We need to run some more tests on the Captain, so you’ll have to leave the room until the tests are finished.”  
“What kinds of tests?”  
“Tests to see if he reacts to any kind of stimuli now that he’s awake. We want to try and at least jog his memory, gently mind you. We don’t want him remembering everything at once, that could very well break him all over again.” They explained as they stood beside Shiro’s bed.  
Those steel eyes studied the newcomers before looking away again, staring at the window out into the hall.  
“Okay. I’ll be right outside if anything changes.”  
“Of course, sir.” The door closed behind Keith and the curtains drew shut and Keith fell to sit in a waiting chair once more.  
It was going to be a long haul before Shiro managed to draw himself back.

“How is he?” Keith blinked, his eyes fluttering open from a nap he had unwittingly taken to see Sam, Pidge and Matt standing in the hall in front of him.  
“No changes.” Keith answered and they glanced back to what had been the sleeping Paladin.  
“Sorry Keith, didn’t meant to wake you.” Pidge apologized.  
“It’s fine. I haven’t been sleeping much any way.” Keith yawned as he knuckled his eyes and stretched his arms over his head to pop his back. “They still haven’t figured a way out to slowly introduce his memories back without causing him severe shock. It’s been gently prodding, but nothing seems to be working at the moment.” Keith slowly stood to his feet and walked over to the window to watch Shiro sleep. “They told me familiar faces would help him, but he’s shown no sign of recognizing who I am. And I’ve been spending all my free time here.” Keith explained and leaned against the wall, arms folding across his chest.  
“You should get some sleep, Kogane. You look dangerously close to crashing.” Sam reached, touching the Black Paladin’s shoulder and Keith just shrugged.  
“I can’t sleep knowing he’s here, lying like that with no memories. I have to be here when he wakes. I need to be the first thing he sees.” Keith explained with a soft sigh, closing those bloodshot eyes as his head dropped forward.  
“Yeah, but, realistically, it could be months before Shiro even remembers who he is, let alone who we are.”  
“Pidge!” Matt snapped at his younger sister, glaring at her. “Not helping!”  
“It’s alright. The doctors already explained it to me.” Keith waved it off and glanced back as the machine beeped it’s steady series of notes while Shiro stirred awake.  
“….Keith….?” Came a soft voice and cold adrenaline spiked through Keith’s body. Shiro said his name!  
All but throwing the door open, Keith was racing to Shiro’s side and grabbing at the hand.  
“Kashi! I’m here!” Keith cried, watching those steel eyes flicker towards him, seeing the Black Paladin kneeling beside the bed.  
“…Keith….where….?”  
“You’re in the med bay on the ATLAS. We have to rescue you from Haggar and Sendak.”  
Steel eyes suddenly flared wide and Shiro jerked upright, screaming and cupping his head at the mention of Sendak’s name.  
“Shiro! Shiro! Listen! It’s me! It’s Keith! Please, Shiro! It’s me!” Keith begged as he held to a thrashing Captain, holding him tight as Shiro screamed into Keith’s shoulder. That strong frame all but trembled in Keith’s arms as the doctors came running at the sound.  
“What happened?!” They demanded as they tried to reach for Shiro, who all but batted them away and clung desperately to Keith instead.  
“He woke up and said my name. I think he’s remembering everything.” Keith explained as he gripped to a sobbing Captain, feeling the man shiver against Keith’s chest. “I’m here, Shiro….I’m here….” Keith cooed, trying to get the man to relax enough to allow the doctors to take a look at him. “Kashi, can you let them take a look? They won’t hurt you, I swear it.” Steel eyes fluttered up and Keith felt his stomach sink at the obvious terror that lay bare in those eyes.  
He couldn’t believe that Sendak had managed to break the Captain so that he feared anyone touching him.  
“Don’t leave….” Shiro begged and Keith shook his head.  
“They’d have to pry my cold, dead body from here before I ever left you alone.” Keith promised and Shiro relaxed enough to allow the doctors to take a look.  
They were careful each time Shiro flinched away from them, waiting until he had relaxed enough to tolerate them once more.  
Dealing with Shiro in this fragile state was like handling a stary dog. They needed the care but refused to trust anyone after being abandoned by people he once called family.  
Keith sat with him, even as they examined his anus and the obvious abuse he had suffered. The Quintessence had healed the wounds and bruising, but it was clear that Shiro had been raped multiple times while he had been held prisoner.  
Keith managed to suppress his snarl at the idea of Sendak having his way with Shiro and how he didn’t have time to give Sendak a slow and painful death like he deserved,  
A whimper drew Keith’s dark thoughts away as Shiro gripped to the front of Keith’s tunic, pressing his face into Keith’s shoulder while the doctors examined he broken joint.  
“He’s going to need a new prosthetic, and I’m sure Sam and his family can come up with something.” One doctor spoke and Keith nodded, hugging Shiro against his chest. “We’ll keep him on some sedatives for a while as his mind slowly adjusts to the shock of waking up with all of his memories. It would be best for his recovery for you to stay with him, Kogane.” One doctor looked up to Keith and the Leader nodded, lowering his gaze to Shiro and stroking the other’s back.  
“I’m never leaving him alone again.” Keith whispered as Shiro slowly fell asleep against Keith’s chest.

It took patience and time as Keith sat with Shiro in between his missions.  
While he hated leaving Shiro alone with the doctors, he knew he was needed to make sure Voltron was able to defend their alliances.  
But in his down time, Keith made sure to spend every second with Shiro as the other slowly worked his way through his horrific memories to overcome the pain and agony they brought. Through the nightmares and sleepless nights. Through the sobbing and the tears while memories of Sendak’s touch haunted Shiro even while wide awake.  
Shiro was getting better, slowly but surely, Shiro was working on his way to overcoming his awful memories with Keith’s help.  
It was later in the afternoon when Keith arrived with some food from the local planet to share with Shiro.  
“Hey. How are you feeling today?” Keith asked as he set the plate down beside the bed and pulled the chair up closer.   
Shiro looked up to the other before his eyes fell to his hand. He was silent for a while, contemplating his answer before giving it.  
“Better. Not great, but….better.” Shiro closed his eyes and Keith frowned at the answer before reaching to touch Shiro’s hand.  
“What can I do?” Shiro gave a strained laugh and glanced back up to Keith.  
“There’s not much you can do. I have to come to terms with what happened….” Shiro shuddered and closed his eyes while squeezing Keith’s hand tight. “Just keep doing what you’re doing now. Fighting the war. You don’t need to be taking care of me.” Shiro smiled, though it was forced and cold.  
Keith grabbed that hand tighter and shook his head.  
“Hey. I’m not leaving you alone like this. We’ll get through it. Together.” Keith smiled for Shiro and held that hand tight. “I promised, didn’t I?”  
The relief in Shiro’s eyes was instantaneous as he leaned forward into Keith’s shoulder.  
“Thank you.” He breathed and Keith rubbed his hand up and down Shiro’s spine.  
“Whatever you need, Kashi.” Keith assured the older as he felt Shiro relax into his embrace.

A great deal of time had passed since then and Shiro was up and moving around the ATLAS now, getting more and more comfortable with taking on his responsibilities again.  
Iverson and Sam were always there to help the Captain and it wasn’t long until Shiro was back at the helm and giving orders once more.  
Everyone was pleased to see the Captain up and moving again, but Keith watched him like a hawk, making sure the man wasn’t pushing himself too hard and not getting enough sleep.  
And it had been one such night where Keith found Shiro sitting in the lounge, holding up an electronic pad while reading over the notes.  
“Kashi.” Keith chided as he walked over to the other, seeing steel eyes flutter up to meet violet ones.  
“Keith. Didn’t hear you. I was just going over the notes from the meeting today.”  
“And not sleeping like you should be. Are the meds not working?” Keith took a seat beside the other male and Shiro sighed, setting the device down.  
“I don’t like taking the meds, it takes me too long to get moving. They make me sluggish.”  
“They’re supposed to. It’s meant to help you sleep.” Keith watched as Shiro closed his eyes and shook his head.  
“They don’t make me sleep, Keith. They just dull the memories long enough for me to be able to close my eyes and not wake up screaming.” Shiro sighed and leaned back against the seat, looking up at the ceiling. “And it doesn’t get rid of his hands.”  
Keith blinked and his eyes shot up to Shiro. That was the first time Shiro had admitted out loud to anyone else that Sendak had, in fact, taken advantage and raped Shiro while being held as a prisoner.   
“….Kashi…” Keith managed to whisper as the older closed his eyes, a shudder shooting up his spine before he glanced back to Keith.  
“Work keeps my mind clear of him. Of what he did. And when I finally need to sleep, I’m so exhausted that it’s just black. Blissful black.” Shiro explained and Keith frowned before lowering his gaze.  
“I’m sorry. It was my fault it happened.” Steel eyes dropped to Keith and Shiro blinked at the Paladin before smiling.  
“No. It wasn’t you’re fault. I didn’t listen to you. I knew it was a trap going in, just didn’t think it was a trap for me. I figured they’d go after you instead. Or Lance. You both are important members of Voltron. It only makes sense to take you out. Not me. I guess Sendak wanted his revenge.” Shiro grit his teeth and closed his eyes, his new prosthetic arm flexing and tightening before relaxing. “Guess he got it, in the end.”  
Keith reached over and touched Shiro’s hand once more.  
“Don’t worry. I’m still here.” Keith smiled for Shiro and the older nodded, clasping his hand over top of Keith’s.  
“And I’m grateful.”   
Pushing himself up to his feet, Shiro stretched his arms over his head and sighed.  
“I suppose I should try and sleep a little bit. There is still so much left to do.” Keith stood beside him and they both headed from the lounge and towards the Captain’s quarters. “Keith, isn’t you’re room the other way?”  
“Yeah. But I thought I’d walk you to yours, first.” He grinned and Shiro laughed.  
“I’m not a 16-year-old girl, Keith. I can handle myself.”  
“I know you can. This is for my own peace of mind.” Keith hummed as he looped his fingers behind his head while they walked.  
It wasn’t long before they reached Shiro’s room and Keith bid him a good night before vanishing down he hall.  
“Call if you need anything.” Keith called over his shoulder as he vanished around the corner.  
Shiro smiled gently and turned to his room. Peeling clothes from his frame, Shiro glanced in the mirror to see the scars Sendak had left from their brutal time together. The marks on his hips and thighs, the round set of teeth marks along his shoulders. Sendak had made sure that Shiro would remember him long after Sendak was killed.  
Tracing the scars on his hips, Shiro shuddered and grabbed his sweats before moving to his bed. He eyed the meds there before deciding against them and he fell into the cool sheets, rolling away from the mirror and towards the wall, trying to will his mind and body to sleep.  
And when he finally did slip, the nightmares soon plagued him deep into the night.

Keith had been toying with his blade, twirling it around as he lay on his bed, staring up at the ceiling when he heard Kosmo shift and whine.  
Sitting up, he looked over to see the wolf standing to his feet and staring at the door.  
“Kosmo?” Keith called and the wolf whined louder before turning to Keith. “What is it?” He had started to reach out for the wolf when his communicator beeped.  
Grabbing it, he flipped it open and heard harsh gasps for air.  
“Hello?”  
“Keith…..help….” It was Shiro and Kosmo was at Keith’s side in a heartbeat, popping from Keith’s room and into Shiro’s  
“Kashi!” Keith ran towards the man, the Captain having fallen to his knees as sweat dripped down his face. Starlight hair stuck to the sides of Shiro’s face as he struggled for the breath he couldn’t find. “Kashi, I’m here!” Keith called, scooping Shiro into his arms and hugging him tight.  
Shiro was stiff for a minute before relaxing into the familiar scent that was Keith, gripping to the man’s tunic and trembling in his arms.  
“Okay. Okay. I’m here.”  
“Don’t leave me…..don’t leave me….”   
“Never, Kashi. Never.”


	8. Art of Breaking

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow! Sorry this took so long to post. It took me some time to get my writing muses back~  
> But, we're back again and I'm really enjoying the way this story is going thus far. Let me know what you guys think and all that jazz~  
> Love you all, guys!

Chapter Eight: Art of Breaking

It was difficult, watching the once strong man work through his horrors all over again. Sendak had done well to break the Captain, tearing his mind apart as much as his body. It was as though Keith had rescued him from the Garrison on that fateful day where they all vanished from Earth to head for the stars in a robotic space lion.  
Keith could almost laugh at the irony if Shiro wasn’t trembling in his arms right now.  
It was like this every night now. Keith would find his way to Shiro’s quarters and stay with him until the Captain had calmed enough to sleep until his alarm woke him the next morning.  
And Keith was running on fumes.  
He hadn’t meant to fall asleep in Shiro’s room, but he had. And Kosmo was sleeping at the foot of the bed. It was nice, bliss like, almost surreal. But it was so unexpected that when Keith woke, he jolted upright. It took him a few tics to realize he was not in his own room and had fallen asleep in Shiro’s.  
Lowering his gaze to see the older still sleeping soundly with no visible signs of nightmares pulling at his dreams, Keith slowly removed himself from the bed and massaged his forehead. What was he doing? He was falling deeper and deeper. This was bad. This was very bad.  
Patting his thigh for Kosmo to follow, the wolf whined when drawn from the comfort of the bed before padding after Keith, wide eyes begging to stay.  
“No! We’re not staying.” Keith hissed as the wolf whined once more before following Keith towards the door.  
He needed to make a quick retreat before Shiro woke to find him still there. Then awkward questions would arise and Keith was not ready to confess his true feelings for Shiro. Especially since the Captain was still recovering from all of those nasty memories that Sendak left him with.  
No, he was not ready for that yet.  
Sparing one last glance over his shoulder, he watched as Shiro rolled in his sleep before Keith stepped from the room with Kosmo behind him. Pressing a hand to his chest and leaning against the door, Keith let a soft gasp escape his lungs while covering his lips with his fingers. Oh god, what had he done? All the things he was imagining danced vividly in his mind. How badly he wanted to hold Shiro, to comfort Shiro, to KISS Shiro.  
Blushing even more, Keith ducked his head and all but raced to his room. At this hour, hardly anyone would be awake and he needed to make it there without being caught.  
Yet, that plan didn’t go as well as Keith had prayed it would. Not only did he run into someone, it had to be his mother of all people.  
“Keith? Are you okay?” She cooed and reached for her kit, only for Keith to shy away. Which only made her persist even more. “What’s wrong?” Krolia crowded Keith against the wall and Keith keened in response, a soft chitter escaping his lips.  
Oh, that was a new noise! Krolia suddenly was grinning and leaning down to look at her kit.  
“I understand now. You’ve found your mate. I suspected it would be the Captain, but I didn’t want to sway you one way or the other.”  
“What are you saying? Mate?”  
“Hmm. Galra mate for life and Shiro seems to be your chosen partner. Kolivan and Ulaz were mates before Ulaz’s untimely demise.”  
“Wait….wait, explain. I don’t understand. How would Shiro be my mate?”  
“You’re half Galra, Keith. Meaning you still have the natural instincts that we Galra possess. You haven’t dated anyone since you’ve become a mature Galra. Despite many young Galra and half breeds vying for your attention, your focus has been on Shiro. Your body unconsciously knew that he was to be your mate. It’s a natural reaction to someone who is bound to be yours. You don’t get to choose, per say. Your body does that for you. Although, your partner has the right to reject your advances. And since Shiro is a full bloodied human, he may not feel the same need and desire that you do. If he rejects you, your body will suffer for a while, trying to cleanse itself of a potential coupling before focusing again on another object of affection. You need to tell him how you feel when the time is right. Or your body will suffer the consequences and you won’t be able to move on.”  
Keith was speechless as Krolia studied him gently, letting the new information sink in. And when it did, Keith suddenly sunk to the floor. Shiro was his mate! No wonder he always became so defensive and angry whenever something happened to the Captain. No wonder he had been so upset when the other Paladins went their own way, leaving Keith to pick up the broken pieces of his beloved leader. Shiro was to be his mate!  
“Remember, Keith. Shiro can reject you. He isn’t bound to the same instincts as the Galra are.” Krolia reminded Keith and the younger focused his gaze back on his mother.  
“Right.” Of course he would. Why would Shiro want to spend any time with Keith when there were much better people out there besides a half-bred Galra.  
The dejection must have been clear in Keith’s eyes because Krolia reached out and stroked the top of her kit’s head.  
“It doesn’t mean he will, it just means he can. That’s all.” Krolia assured him and Keith sighed, nodding and looking up to his mother. She held a hand out and pulled Keith to his feet, kissing the top of his head as she closed him in a hug. “I wish the best for you, Keith. I wish that Shiro accepts you so you don’t have to suffer.” She hummed and Keith nestled into her shoulder.  
“Thanks mom.” He smiled and she nodded.  
“Now, off to bed. I can smell Shiro on you. You need to wash off soon or the other Galra may suspect that you have a mate and congratulate you before you can confess.” She thrummed and Keith responded with another soft chitter before heading to his room to wash and sleep for the rest of the night.

When the morning came, Keith knuckled his eyes and dragged himself up with a yawn. He was still reeling over the new information Krolia had given him. Shiro could be his mate. How was one supposed to digest that info? Hell, he just found out that Galra even have potential mates and select one for life. That was news for the half breed in of itself. Learning that his instincts had chosen Shiro as his potential mate was a whole different mess he had to come to terms with.  
Knuckling his eyes a few times, Keith sniffed at his arms to make sure he didn’t reek of the Captain before changing into his uniform. He wasn’t ready to divulge any information with the other Blades yet. They would give his secret away before he had a chance to even tell Shiro who he felt.  
A groan left Keith’s lungs and he reached into the sink to splash water on his face to help sharpen his mind. He needed to focus. He couldn’t spend his day wishing and dreaming about what could be with Shiro. He hadn’t come to terms with the new information yet himself. And daydreaming about what could be was dangerous and could very likely get him killed.  
Kosmo wagged at the door as Keith tied his hair back into a loose ponytail. When had it gotten so long? Should he cut it again?  
“No time to deal with it now.” Keith thrummed to himself and left his room to head to the mess hall. Shiro would be up by now and already having his quick breakfast before heading to the bridge. He wanted to at least check on the Captain before finding food for himself and Kosmo.  
Stepping into the near empty mess hall, Keith smiled to see Shiro sitting alone with a plate of food, coffee and a computer pad in his hand. He was already hard at work.  
Kosmo instantly left Keith’s side to bound towards the Captain while Keith gathered his meal for both himself and the cosmic wolf. Turning, he could see Shiro smiling while he pet the top of Kosmo’s head with his now free hand while still reading all the new information gathered for the day. Keith grinned to himself and crossed the space to sit across from Shiro, taking a bite of his food silently while setting the second tray down for Kosmo.  
“How did you sleep?” Keith asked after swallowing his first bite.  
“Better than before. I think having you there helped me relax enough to get a few hours in. It’s better than the meds, I woke up on time this morning.” Shiro hummed and Keith chuckled, nodding.  
“I’m glad. You need some sleep, Kashi. You can’t run on 60 hours with no sleep.” Keith teased and Shiro rolled his eyes before taking another sip of his coffee.  
“I can try.”   
“Uh huh. Well. I won’t catch you when you fall flat on your face.” Keith sneered, only to glance up when he heard more voices. Lance and the others had woken, stepping into the mess hall to get food.  
Violet eyes fluttered up to Shiro and he watched the man carefully close himself off from the others and it made Keith’s heart ache at the sight. Shiro was shutting the others out, despite Keith’s presence, and he hated seeing their leader lock himself away once more.  
Just like he had with Sendak.  
No wonder he was so good at this. He had been doing this for a very long time.  
Without even thinking, Keith reached across and squeezed Shiro’s hand, wanting to assure the Captain that he wasn’t going anywhere and was not about to leave the other alone. A small break in that shield Shiro had formed allowed Keith to see those warm eyes once more before they closed off again as Lance sauntered towards the table with the other Paladins. Damn the Cuban and his awful timing!  
“Morning guys! What’s on the docket for today?” He grinned as he sat down beside Keith. Shiro glanced to the device in his hand and read it over before answering.  
“More deliveries. Need to make sure our allies get their needed supplies. We also have a small lead on Haggar’s location and we need to follow it up.” Shiro answered, his eyes never leaving the device as he swallowed the last of his coffee. “I expect to see everyone ready in two hours.” Shiro ordered as he stood to his feet, giving Kosmo one last pat before leaving the mess hall.  
Violet eyes followed that taut frame and he sighed, seeing the tension and stress in those shoulders. He toyed with his food, spreading his scrambled eggs on his plate before dropping it on the floor for Kosmo to finish. With Shiro gone, he wasn’t exactly hungry anymore.  
“I’ll see everyone in the bay in a few hours. I’m going to the training hall.” Kosmo barked and jumped to his feet, padding after the half breed with his tail wagging. Keith needed to work off his own anger before joining his comrades in the Lion’s bay.  
Finding Kolivan there had been both a blessing and a curse. He knew he didn’t have to hold back with the Blade leader, but he also knew that Kolivan wouldn’t pull his punches either.  
“You’re tense, little one.” Kolivan purred when he saw Keith’s stiff posture after their duel. He walked over to the young half breed and massaged his claws into Keith’s shoulders, drawing a low purr from the other. Which only had Kolivan smiling. “Now I understand.”  
“Oh god! You and mom both!” Keith hissed, slapping those hands away and wrapping his arms around himself. “How do you guys know?!”  
“Instinct, Keith. We trust our senses more than humans do. And we can tell when a Galra has chosen their mate. It’s the noises. You’re purring, which means you’re accepting your Galra side. Which also means you’ve accepted your potential mate. Is it the Captain, perchance?” Kolivan settled down beside Keith with a low thrum as the younger blushed. “It is as I suspected. Captain Takashi Shirogane is a good choice for a mate, though he may not be able to provide offspring.”  
“I don’t want kids!” Keith panicked, violet eyes snapping up to the leader, who chuckled at the small outburst.  
“Offspring are not the basis for a choice in a mate, it is merely an avenue some choose. Ulaz and I wanted to adopt orphans when the war was over. I may still do so, when all is said and done.” Kolivan hummed and Keith studied the leader before a sad noise left his lips.  
“Will you chose another?”  
“No. Ulaz and I were a bonded pair and Galra pair for life. I will never have another partner.” Kolivan sighed and closed his eyes before Keith took his hand.  
“I’m sorry.”  
“Tis not your fault, Keith. His sacrifice was not in vain.” Kolivan squeezed Keith’s hand before standing. “If it is any consolation, the Blades accept the Captain as your mate.”  
“Wait, I have to get permission?”  
“It is customary for Galra to inspect potential mates to make sure they are the best suited for one another. An ill fitting pair can be detrimental to the stability of the Galra band as a whole. Pairs must lift each other up, not drag each other down. For example, if you had chosen the Red Paladin, it would be an ill fitted pairing.” Keith made a face and shook his head.  
“Ew. No way. I would never find Lance attractive like that. Besides, he’s with Allura! Ew. No.” Kolivan chuckled and nodded.  
“But you see my point. The two of you fight each other more than the enemy. With the Captain, you suit each other and protect each other. All the while fighting the enemy to the best of your abilities. You are a well suited pair. If the Captain accepts you. Have you told him yet?”  
“No. I haven’t figured out how to explain that exactly.”  
“Do you not have pairs on Earth?”  
“We do, but we don’t pair for life necessarily. We can get married, but if it doesn’t work out, you can always divorce and move on to another partner.” Kolivan made a thoughtful noise and nodded before glancing over his shoulder.  
“I have an idea. It was how I explained to Ulaz that he was to be my mate. Do you wish to know?”  
“If it’s not too personal.” Keith fidgeted and Kolivan smiled.  
“For the youngest kit in our clan, nothing is personal. We want you to learn and grow into the best you can. And if telling you my story will aide in wooing your potential mate, then I have no qualms sharing. Ulaz would delight in telling you if he were able.” Kolivan rubbed the top of Keith’s head, which drew a happy chitter from Keith as he grinned up at his leader. “Find me in my quarters tonight, Keith. I will tell you our story. For now, join your comrades and prepare for the day. You’ve sparred enough with me and it is time I join Krolia and the others to discuss our next move.”  
“Thank you Kolivan.” Keith waved to the other as he headed off to the Lion’s bay to gather with the other Paladins.

Following the potential lead on Haggar had turned into a bust and it set a foul mood in the Atlas. They still were no closer to finding the witch than the were three weeks ago. It made everyone tense aboard the ship, knowing she was out there doing God knows what to God knows how many innocents.  
“I can’t believe we still can’t find her!” Allura hissed, threading her fingers through long locks while Keith closed his eyes.  
“She’s good at covering her tracks, We’ll find her soon enough.” Keith reassured as Lance stood beside the Princess.  
“Doesn’t make it any easier.” Lance complained, arms crossing over his chest.  
“We’ll find her, guys. We just have to be patient and focus. She’ll either slip and make a mistake, or come after us soon. She knows we’re a threat and she’ll want to take us out as soon as she’s strong enough.” Keith stood to his feet and pinched the bridge of his nose, staving off a building headache. He had been getting a lot of those recently and he briefly wondered if it was due to his new discovery. If his body was informing him of his instinctual needs.  
A groan left his lungs and Keith squeezed his eyes tighter when Lance started to complain again, siding with Allura once more. It was the same thing over and over again, complaining about the war while protecting and defending Allura. Boy was he glad his body didn’t choose Lance! He wouldn’t be able to put up with the constant whining.  
“Hey, Keith, you okay?” Pidge drew him from his thoughts and violet eyes fluttered up to see four sets of eyes focused on him.  
“Yeah. I’m fine. Just have a headache from Lance’s whining.”  
“I do not whine!” Lance chirped and Keith just chuckled, shaking his head and turning away. “Hey! Where are you going?”  
“To take some painkillers. I’ll be back.” Keith waved over his shoulder as he vanished down the hall. When he had cleared the corner, Keith sunk to his knees, suddenly gasping and trembling. “What…the hell…?” Keith whispered, reaching for Kosmo as the wolf leaped towards him.  
He was instantly at his mother’s side, who blinked before reaching for her kit.  
“It’s starting to take affect.” She explained as Kolivan stood to his feet to help the other back to his feet.  
“What is?”  
“You need to tell the Captain soon or this is only going to get worse. I explained how your body reacts when you find your mate. It also punishes itself when denied that potential mate for too long. And you’ve been in love with Shiro for a very long time.” Krolia offered as she stroked the top of her kit’s head. Keith cooed and pressed into her chest, soft chittering and squeaking leaving his lips as he relaxed in her arms.  
“How soon?”  
“Honestly? By tonight. He needs to know.” Keith closed his eyes and took in a shaky breath. He wasn’t ready to confront those feelings yet, but his body was suffering the backlash of waiting too long. Damn Galra instincts. They always got him into trouble.  
“Kolivan? Will you tell me now? I know it’s not what we agreed upon but…..”  
“Come with me, little one.” Kolivan extended his hand and Keith took it, allowing himself to be dragged to his feet and towards the leader’s quarters. This was a story to be shared in private, Keith realized as Kolivan closed the door behind them. It was a tender and personal subject for Kolivan and Keith was honored to be able to listen to this story.  
“It was years ago, back when your own mother was still a kit herself. Ulaz and I were still young and full of spirit. Much like yourself, Keith.” Kolivan cooed as he settled down on his bed. Keith took a spot on the floor, those trembles having died down enough to sit still and listen. “It happened when I saw Ulaz confront one of the Galra generals. It was a breathtaking sight, watching him fight one on one with the general. They were evenly matched in almost every way, except Ulaz was a hair faster than the other. And in the moment Ulaz had victory, my entire body sang with the need to claim Ulaz as my mate. He was the strongest in our clan, save for myself, and I knew he was to be mine.” Kolivan trilled at the memory and smiled, eyes closed as he visualized that night. “I wanted to prove my worth. I wanted there to be no hesitation in his answer so I challenged him. That night, I marched into his quarters and demanded a spar between the two of us. He rejected me the first and second time. After the third time, he finally agreed and we fought for what felt like hours. Ulaz won. I was stronger, but he was faster. He had me pinned by the end of the match and defeated me entirely.” Kolivan chuckled and Keith leaned forward a little.  
“What happened after?”  
“While he held me, I confessed. I told him that I wanted him to be my mate and it threw him off guard. Taking that chance, I pinned him to the ground and waited for his answer. He then had confessed that he, too, had wanted me to be his and we bonded that night.” Kolivan sighed and touched the necklace hanging down his chest. “He gave me this for our first ceremony. I have never taken it off since.” Keith leaned back and toyed with the idea.  
It was a good idea, but with Shiro’s current condition and his current state of mind, he wasn’t sure sparring was the best idea.  
“I know what you’re thinking, kit. But don’t you think allowing him to spar with you is better than trying to coddle him? He’s a warrior, same as you. Let him fight. You can see it in his eyes. He wants to fight back, but no one will allow him a even partner. They are too careful around him. Afraid of breaking him. From the rumors I’ve heard of the Champion, he is a force to be reckoned with. Remind him how strong he is, Keith. He will be grateful, even if he rejects you. He will still be grateful and that is better than treating him like he is a fragile newborn, yes?” Keith thrummed in response and nodded slowly.  
“Thank you, Kolivan. That helps.” Keith stood to his feet and left the room, searching for Shiro while heading for the training room. Stepping into the empty room, Keith smiled and glanced up to the control room.  
“Atlas, book the room for Keith Kogane and sparring partner.”  
“Acknowledged. Room is now in private use for Keith Kogane and sparring partner.” Keith stretched his arms above his head and turned on his toe to reach for his computer pad.  
“Shiro? Got a minute to spar? Meet me in the training room?”  
“Sure Keith. I’ll be there shortly.”  
“What’s this about?”  
“Don’t worry about it. I’ll see you soon.” Keith took a deep breath and waited inside the room until Shiro showed up five minutes later.  
“Sorry that took so long. Needed to finish my report.”  
“Don’t worry about it, Shiro. I’ve booked the training room for just us tonight.”  
“Really? What for?”  
“Well, you haven’t had the chance to really let go since you…capture. I figure being your sparring partner tonight would allow you some freedom to really let loose. I know you haven’t found a partner who won’t hold back on you so, how about me?” Keith grinned as he removed his boots and shirt, leaving him in just his pants.  
A slow grin curled at Shiro’s lips and he nodded, removing his uniform shirt and boots before stretching his muscles.  
“Care if I warm up first?”  
“No. Want me to help you stretch?” Shiro nodded and Keith reached to help the Captain stretch those muscles. All the while, Keith’s body screamed to claim the Captain as his own.  
Not yet.  
Once the two of them had warmed their bodies, Shiro and Keith squared off.  
“Promise not to hold back on me?”  
“Of course not, Kashi. You need this more than I do.” Keith grinned and rolled his shoulders before launching towards the Captain. Shiro easily batted Keith aside and spun to kick out wide with his left ankle. Keith dropped into a roll and avoided the attack before leaping back to his feet.  
Shiro was still as fast as he ever had been.  
Good. This was going to be a hard match.

Their match went on for almost two hours, evenly matched in both strength and speed. It was almost going to wind up being a tie until Shiro misjudged Keith’s feint and the half breed dropped the Captain to his knees.  
Both of them were gasping hard, skin dripping with sweat as Keith kept his grip tight on the other.  
“Yield.” Keith growled, baring his teeth while violet eyes fluttered between violet and yellow. Shiro glanced up to Keith, watching the other for a beat before a grin curled across his lips.  
“Always so confident you’ve won. You’ve let your guard down again.” Shiro kicked back with his right foot and Keith cried out at the impact, dropping back and releasing his hold on the Captain. Which allowed Shiro the opportunity to pin Keith to the mats, one hand holding both hands behind Keith’s back while the prosthetic one flared next to Keith’s throat.  
“Yield?” Keith grunted and struggled for a second, before nodding and relaxing. Shiro released his hold and stood up, laughing and gasping hard. One hand reached to push silver hair from his face while the other stretched down to help Keith to his feet.  
Now! It was now or never! His body screamed at him and Keith gripped to Shiro’s hand tight, making sure the other didn’t turn away.  
“Keith? You okay?” Shiro asked, leaning down a little to look to the younger.  
“I have to tell you something.”  
“Okay. I’m listening.”  
“There’s something I’ve learned recently about Galra and their…..way of impressing a potential mate.”  
“Mate?”  
“Wait….let me finish. I’m so nervous I might not get this all out if you interrupt me.” Keith flicked his eyes up to Shiro and the Captain could see the tension in his face. He was struggling with something incredibly important. So Shiro simply nodded and waited for Keith to continue. “You’ve been in my life longer than anyone I know. I’ve always idolized you. Wanted to become you. You helped me when no one saw anything but a Garrison drop out and an ugly orphan. And when I found my heritage, you were the first to defend me when everyone else suddenly became afraid. You are so important to me, Kashi, that I can’t even put in to words what you mean. And because of how much you mean to me, I began to notice changes in my behavior. As did my mother and Kolivan. They explained it to me, that my Galran nature, my Galran instincts had finally chosen a mate now that I was of Galran age. You are that chosen mate, Kashi. I have decided that you are to be mine, if you accept my advances.” Violet eyes finally fluttered up to study Shiro’s expression, wincing at the blank look he got before Shiro pulled his hands back. “Shiro….wait, please---!”  
“Don’t! Let me just think!” Shiro barked and Keith froze, wincing at the sudden sharp tone. It was too soon. It was much too soon! Keith was losing him!  
Panic ebbed painfully in Keith’s chest as Shiro covered his face with his hands, making him almost unreadable for Keith.  
No. No. No. Shiro was going to reject him! No! He didn’t want this! Damn it! He shouldn’t have said anything! Why did he have to open his stupid mouth and confess?! Why did he always ruin things!? This was obviously too much for Shiro to handle!  
So Keith did the one thing he did best.  
He ran.  
Fleeing from the training room with a quick apology, Keith sprinted towards a shuttle, Kosmo right behind him.  
Ignoring all the orders to cease and the questions hurtled towards him over the comms, Keith opened the bay doors and fired the engines of the shuttle, leaving the Atlas behind in a wave of tears.  
He had destroyed the one thing he swore to protect.  
Now there was absolutely nothing left for him.  
Locking in a set of coordinates and putting the shuttle on autopilot, Keith curled into the chair and wept into his knees while Kosmo whined beside him.  
“Stupid…..stupid half breed. What could he ever see in you? You’re just a child! You don’t mean anything to him! Why did you have to ruin the one good thing you had left? Why are you so stupid? Why did you have to hurt him? Why…..why?” Keith whispered into the dark with no hope of an answer. He knew what he had done. He had hurt the Captain and had risked the entire operation. He needed to now remove himself from the equation to ensure the Atlas and the Voltron Coalition were a success. They could fight Haggar without him. Shiro could still pilot the Black Lion and Iverson knew how to handle the Atlas. They didn’t need him. He was expendable, like he always had been.  
Curling even more into the chair, Keith fell into a bitter darkness, hands gripping to his arms until blood dripped past his fingers.  
He knew no one would miss him.  
It was better this way.


End file.
